Grateful Friday

First of all, both my sisters wondered why we had inside recess.  There was a thunderstorm.  Right during lunch recess and then the sun came out and all thunderstorms were forgotten.

Except the rest of the afternoon was crazy town.  Guess what super active 8 year old boys need?  Recess.

I tried to talk to both sisters yesterday, but alas.

I guess we'll just communicate through my blog.

I'm grateful for my sisters.  Even when our schedules don't align, they are in the world and I'm grateful.

I'm grateful I walk with Clarissa.  We talk about personalities and museums and how our days went and everything in between. Some days we solve all the world's problems, if everyone would just listen to us.  She is quality and feels like a gift in my life.

Even though this is the hardest class I've ever had, I'm grateful for my job.  I keep learning.  I keep trying. I love my friends who I work with.

I'm grateful it's Friday.  I love weekends with Adam.

I love General Conference weekend and I feel very grateful it is upon us.

I'm grateful Emma gets to go on a dreamy trip with Geri and Megan and Talia to Ireland.  She leaves today.  She's the most independent person I know, but I love that last night she called me and said, "Go through what I need to take.  Ask me if I have everything."

I cataloged a list of necessities.  She had forgotten Advil and a hairbrush.  Mom's are good for something. I asked her if she had a pen and notebook.  She said no.  She said, "I have my phone if I need to write something down."  

I said, "What if you need to draw something?"

She said, "I have my iPad." Hmph.  I'm a pen and paper girl.

I'm happy for her that she gets to take this trip though.  She has an overnight flight I don't envy, but maybe she'll see the Northern Lights, which are magical.

I'm grateful for text messages like this one.  I'm pretty sure this is the main reason to have a phone.

Keeping calm(ish) and carrying on

Janelle sent this truth to me.

But, the upside is, there's nothing wrong with optimism.  What if things actually DO slow down a bit next week?

They won't, but let me have this OK?

I have a new BYU practicum teacher.  She is lovely and reminds me of Anna and then I found out she works at the BYU library like Anna used to do and that she knows Anna!  (They don't know each other well, she just said, "Wait, does she have red hair?"  People remember red hair.)

I enjoy having her but it is also extra work + less prep time because I'm working with her to figure out when and what she is going to teach.

Also, she is there observing me and seeing all my fumbling and flailing.  I am a walking and talking cautionary tale.  After an abysmal writing lesson that didn't go well AT ALL (it didn't help that it was after inside recess--nobody wins with inside recess), I told her that a big part of teaching was pivoting and resetting when things don't work.

At least for me that is the case.  

I guess what I'm saying is, she isn't going to be intimidated by me or think she won't measure up.... 

Teaching 3rd grade is maybe one of the most humbling experiences of my life.

 

Between grass and hay

We were invited to our ward's empty nester FHE last night.  They have dinner and then typically share a story from their life or family history.  Last night people shared mementos.  They were interesting and I enjoyed it.

But I felt like we weren't ready for that group yet.

Someone talked about how they've been with their husband for 51 years.

A guy was talking about his career back in 1979.

I was six.

Maybe it's nice to be the young ones.  It's the opposite situation at school where a lot of the teachers could be my children.

Yesterday I had a BYU practicum teacher start.  I feel motherly toward her.

I'll just keep easing into old age, one empty nester gathering at a time....

Weekend

Friday, math went well.  It was the first time all year I can say that.  I am not going to credit the Swig Janelle brought me at 7:45 AM, but I'm not going to not credit it either.  

Also on Friday, Adam and I had some friends and neighbors over.  It was an empty-nester-ish gathering.  It ended up being Shannon and Chris, Jenn and Greg, and Doug (his wife, Kim, is a victim's advocate and got called into work--I don't envy her that stressful gig).

We sat around our fire pit until well past dark and roasted s'mores (Shannon brought Reeses peanut butter cups and they were a good variation).  We talked about all sorts of things.  Doug regaled us with crazy stories.  Adam and Chris talked about pizza.  Shannon told us about seeing the biggest tire and the biggest ketchup bottle, among other things.  She said she grew up in a family that likes quirky things.  

We told her she needs to go to the Jolly Green Giant in Minnesota.  She is adding it to her list.

We talked about National Parks and the numbering system of interstates and highways and snorkeling and which country we would move to if we could.  Shannon insisted she wouldn't live anywhere except America.  I said, "OK, but you have to.  Where would you go?"

As it got later, we talked about spiritual things we don't understand.

There's something really nice about this stage of life.  We are past our lives being dictated by our teenagers' busy schedules and Jenn and I talked about how our grandchildren are just cuter than any other children and that is just a fact.

Saturday morning, when Mark finally emerged from hibernation in the basement, he saw our McDonald's cups and said, "Did you clean the church?"

Cleaning the church is always followed by breakfast at McDonald's.  That is also a fact.

I switched our home from summer decorations to autumn.  I asked Adam if he thought the other seasons were sad that they weren't autumn.

I love it.

We went to my classroom and rearranged the deskss.  If that carpet gets worn out faster than it should, it will be because I dragged the desks around. A lot.

Saturday night we finished the Junior Bake Off show.  There is something about baking competitions that really soothes your soul.  There is so much drama, but it's about dessert.

Emma and Mark sang in church.  I was more concerned about it than anyone else.  "Are you going to...practice?"  They are comfortable singers though, and pulled it off.  Of course I thought it sounded good, because I always do.

I made beef bulgogi for dinner.  I used a different recipe than the previous time (I am trying to find a good recipe because Mark loves beef bulgogi.  At a restaurant or if I buy the sauce, it has gluten).  I don't quite have it yet, but we wrapped it in lettuce leaves with kimchi and very aptly named Yum Yum sauce.  I liked it!

We finished off with watching an episode of the latest season of the Great British Baking Show.  

Braeden and Anna are creating a bracket with their friends to see who will win.  Some people do March Madness, some people to the Great British Baking Show....

Grateful Friday

Parent teacher conferences are done for now.  That is a lot to be grateful for.  They are exhausting.

I had two different mothers cry.  I keep Kleenex handy and I don't mind.  As a mother prone to crying myself.  I get it.  Mothering is hard. I hope that I'm able to validate and reassure.  I try. 

Another thing I'm very grateful about is that my biopsy was benign.  Mark told me he and Emma "had a moment" when they found out.  Those two don't say more than they ever need to and I didn't know they were worried.

My friend Jamie was worried too.  She cried when I told her the good news.  It is nice to be loved.

The number one thing I'm grateful for today is that Adam is home.  While he was gone:

• the faucet broke in our master bathroom
• I had car problems, twice
• I had a biopsy
• we had a boil order
• I missed him a lot 

In summary:  things fall apart.

I'm grateful for Mark who is a stalwart companion always.

I'm grateful for my family; my parents and siblings and nieces and nephews.  We have a WhatsApp conversation that ranges from silliness to seriousness and everywhere in between.  We pray for each other and they are a big strength to me.

I have an oxalis plant and it is different than every other plant.  It goes dormant in summer and seems completely dead.  I started watering it again recently and I thought maybe this time it really was dead.

I noticed this yesterday:

It made me really happy.  Things have a way of working out and a plant that comes back from what seems like completely dead is a great reminder that even if it doesn't feel like things are going to work out, because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, they will.

One down, one to go

Adam is getting home tonight!  Kind of.  When I asked him what time his flight got in on Wednesday, he said, "11:59 PM."

So when he initially told me he was going to be gone Wednesday to Wednesday, that was sort of a positive spin on the situation.

I miss him and will glad to have him home!

Last night were parent teacher conferences.  They are exhausting.  I was at the school for 12 hours, like Friday.  This time it was twelve full hours of talking to people.  Even during my prep, I had two students who had had come aparts and needed me.  I had back to back to back conferences, which means tomorrow night will be a lighter load.  I'm glad because I have these stacks of papers that need to be dealt with.  

There are always stacks of papers.

Besides how tired it makes me, I like parent teacher conferences.  I like talking to the parents of my students and it always gives me insight into their lives.

When I got home, I talked to Mark for a few minutes.  We read scriptures and prayed together.  I asked him if he wanted be social or unite separately.  

He said, "Well do you mind if I don't really want to be social?"

I said, "Not even a little bit."

Sometimes fellow introverts are worth their weight in gold.

Diversionary tactics

It is no surprise that struggling readers don't love to read.  Yesterday I called a small group back to my table so I could listen to them read.

One student tried every trick she could think of.

Me: Come on.  I need you here at my table.

Me: Yes, you.  Come on.

Me: Get a stool.

Me: Sit down.

Me: No, don't tilt.

Me: Stop spinning.  Get your book.

Student: I don't know what page we're on.

Me: This page. (smoothing book open and pointing) Right here.

Me: I want to hear your voice too. You need to read.

Student: Where are we?

Me: (pointing) Right here.

Student: Wait.

Me: What?

Student: (pointing at my head) Are those natural curls?

Me: Yes.

Student: (closing her eyes like she's transported) Because they are beautiful!

Me: (pointing to the page) OK.  Now you need to read.

Student: (sighing deeply) Fine.

Weekend

Like I told Adam, Friday was such a crazy day, it sort of went around the horn and wasn't crazy any more because it was just surreal.

The struggling students struggled hard.  I had tears, I had escapees, I had administrators and the school psychologist and the special ed teacher in my classroom trying to corral and cajole and calm.

But no one threw up. 

There's that.

The principal hugged me when I took my class to lunch.  She recognizes what I'm up against, which is validating.

We got everyone more or less settled.  We marched on, because what choice do we have?  I decided that since Adam wasn't home and Mark was going straight from work to hang out with friends, that I would stay at school until my to do list was done.

I wavered and considered I could just go back on Saturday, but I didn't want to.  I stuck it out.  I didn't finish my to do list, but I did a lot.  I was at the school for 12 hours.  Between leaving early the previous day (even though I took stuff home) and parent teacher conferences this week, there were many tasks to churn through.

When I was driving home, I wondered what was actually wrong with me.  Why did I just spend 12 hours at work?  I felt like I was doing life all wrong.

I went to bed early and slept for 9 blissful hours.  Saturday morning I was reading the Liahona and read an  article by a woman who helped people after wildfires in California.  She was inspired by Esther and considered that she was born for such a time as this too.  She quoted President Hinckley in the article:

You are good.  But it is not enough just to be good.  You must be good for something.  You must contribute good to the world.

That encouraged me.  Maybe spending time trying to teach children is not doing life all wrong.  It was a topsy turvy week and a confluence of circumstances that made it so I had so much work to do (it's not normally that much!).  

I want to be good for something.  I want to contribute good to the world.  Being a teacher feels like a calling.  It feels like I'd do it for free.  I love it and it wears me out and beats me down but makes me better.

I think that's the whole point of life anyway.

And I was extremely grateful for the restorative weekend I had.

The boil order was lifted and I puttered around doing household chores.  I watered my plants and paid the bills and did the dishes.  I tried to get the dry erase marker out of my shirt (occupational hazard).  I glued 320 pom poms on a sweatshirt for my Halloween costume.

Yeah, you read that correctly.

I am dressing up as my skittle machine.  I ordered more pom poms for the back (Walmart didn't have any--is everyone getting their skittle machine Halloween costume ready?  Is that why Walmart was fresh out of pom poms?)

The fact that I am putting thought and effort into a Halloween costume in September is because 1) I am a pre-crastinator and 2) peer pressure.  The teachers at my school are completely in on dressing up on Halloween.  I have gone from a Halloween hater to a person who prepares their costume in September.

I guess be careful who you hang out with because peer pressure is real.

I also worked on my cross-stitch and did errands with Mark.  He hung out with Marek in the evening and I ate bread dipped in olive oil and balsamic vinegar and a slice of cheese for dinner.  It is one of my favorite dinners.

Sometimes you just need a chilled out day to work on solitary projects.

Sunday afternoon Mark and Emma and I had the most bizarre FaceTime call ever with Adam in Michigan and the Davis Davises.  It was sort of like a weird dream.  Just like a weird dream, I'll spare you the description, except Adam was in a bus and I was sorting batteries and Eleanor was being adorable and the kids were messing with filters.

Then we played Mexican Train and I may or may not have created a specific playlist for playing Mexican train.  

We had a gluten free dinner and gluten free brownies after which they talked about songs from their childhood which to me are just songs.  I have zero idea when songs were hits.  

I like weekends.  I wish Adam and Braeden and Anna and Eleanor were here too.  

(I think they would have liked the playlist.)

 

Grateful Friday

Yesterday I had my biopsy.  I left school early with a pile of work to do at home (one of my former students saw me in the hall.  He saw my stuff and said, "Are you leaving?"  I said yes.  He said, "Who is with your class?!?"

I assured him they were in good hands.

My class wondered why I was going to the doctor again.  "Are you OK?" 

"I'm fine." I told them.  I'm fine.

My friend told me it "wasn't fun," because she had had one.  My friend Emily told me, "you will be sore."

They were not wrong.

I sort of hated it, but the doctor asked me about what I do for a job and I told him I teach third grade and he has a son who is in third grade.  He checked with me to make sure his son wasn't supposed to be doing homework.  I told him I don't assign homework besides read for 30 minutes per night.

He was worried, "My son's teacher said to read 20 minutes per night.  Is the state law 30 minutes?"

I assured him 20 minutes was fine.  We talked about books his son may like to read and I suggested The Dragon Masters series which Ruby sent to me and my students are loving.

So all that conversation was distracting, but I was glad when the biopsy was over.

I left the hospital with a big bandage/ice pack on my neck that made mobility limited.

Then Joan wouldn't start.  

I have a handy battery charger, but I was still concerned about Joan, especially since Adam is out of town and Mark and I are the problem solvers around here.  (She has been having battery problems more and more frequently.)

I settled down at my desk to do my work and I got a notification that we have a boil order.

The fun keeps coming....just waiting on the frogs, lice and flies.

When Mark got home we went to Costco and bought a battery (and went to MOD for dinner.  I felt like garbage + a boil order doesn't make me want to cook or create a lot of dishes that need washing).

Mark changed the battery which I was very grateful for.  He needed my help at one point to hold the connector things out of the way while he dropped the battery in.  It's always good to have a Mark around.  I went to bed early.

This morning I kind of feel like I've been hit by a truck.  I'm not sure how needles in the neck can make that happen, but at least it's Friday.

I can wear jeans to work on Friday.

A positive for the balance sheet.

I'm grateful for Mark and cooler weather and my family and my faith which sustains me.  I'm grateful for my friends and my job and my peaceful home.  I'm grateful I could get a new battery and that I can boil water, rather than get sick from drinking it.

I'm grateful it is Friday.

Perspective

Yesterday felt really heavy.  You can't teach at a Title 1 school without intersecting with some tragic lives.  

It makes my worries seem smaller and more manageable.

It makes me grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ which will right the wrongs done to these little ones and wipe away their tears.

It makes me want to keep trying.

And keep buying books and wobble stools and Skittles.

I'll bring as much bright color as I can.  

I don't like Skittles (which is why I have them for my class instead of M&M's) but to me a rainbow symbolizes hope.

Taste the rainbow.

Critical Race Theory

This isn't about Critical Race Theory (though if it were, it may excite some people).  I was thinking of CRT because I remembered that one of my friends asked me (and she wasn't joking) if I teach Critical Race Theory to my students.

I have exactly zero students on grade level for math.

I have four that are on grade level for reading.

Their behavior is abysmal.

Many of them have two households that wreak all sorts of havoc in their little lives.

Wondering if I teach them Critical Race Theory was like when Mark was a whirling dervish of a toddler and people asked me if I curled his hair.

In other news, yesterday evening was (dare I say it?) blustery.  It wasn't quite cold, but it wasn't hot and it was rainy and the sky was moody.

It felt like fall.

I am here for it!

Series of unfortunate events

Lately Adam and I have been watching the Junior Baking Show on Netflix which is a delight.  I think I had baking on my mind because last night I had a dream that I kept baking cakes and my students kept putting their feet into the cakes.  

So that kind of sums up how it is going....

Yesterday, I staggered to school having not slept well at all.  A great start to a Monday morning.

I had traffic duty before and after school and I had recess duty and since it was Monday, we didn't have specialties so I had no prep time.

At lunchtime, I saw on my phone that my dad had had an accident involving a horse having a come apart and my dad being run over by a buggy.  Marianne was Marianne (I told her none of the rest of us could have done it) and got him to the doctor.  She drove.  You can mess with a lot of people, but Marianne is not one of them.

So I went from worrying about one parent to worrying about two parents. 

I talked to them after school and I think they're OK.  I think my dad is going to be sore for awhile.

After school, I went from one meeting to another meeting to another meeting and then I had to leave to get to the doctor.

Since I had zero time before and after school, during recess and no prep, my classroom was a hot mess, but I had to leave.

I went to the doctor's office to get the disk with my thyroid ultrasound that I needed to take to the hospital in preparation for my biopsy.  They had to see if they could read the ultrasound, because "sometimes" it doesn't work.

The disk, of course, was not ready as promised. I waited for twenty minutes, dying inside.  I had stuff to do!

The radiology department, of course, did not have anyone there who could read the disk anyway.

I hustled home to walk with Clarissa, but it turned out she couldn't walk and it also turned out dinner was in the crockpot, but not started.  (We struggle.)

I talked to Adam and Mark while they were driving home.  I told them all the things.  Adam said, "Do you want to go back to your classroom and do work?  I'll bring you dinner."

YES.

So I spent about 45 minutes in my classroom, taming the chaos.  Adam and Mark brought me Del Taco.  

It all ended up with me feeling like I was ready to fight another day!  (If I can just keep my students from sticking their feet in my cake.)

Onward.

Weekend

It was an overall nice weekend.  It also had some difficult parts (I taught Relief Society and I also had to go represent our RS president at a meeting at 7:00 AM on Sunday morning).  Nothing should happen at 7:00 AM on Sunday morning.  

That should be a rule.

Even though I usually leave around 7:00 on weekday mornings, my body knew it was Sunday and I didn't want to move.  

Adam has a 7:00 AM meeting nearly every Sunday.  He didn't yesterday, but his body also knew it was Sunday and he was awake anyway.

Darn bodies.

We got lots of great pictures from Washington.

A bottle with Great Grandma Geri on the beach.  She was arguably already a great grandma, but now it's official.

This picture made me so happy.  Those two are a great team and I couldn't ask for a better daughter-in-law.

Great Aunt Megan.  Arguably, she was already a great aunt, but now it is official.

Adam's brother Brian has sent him texts all during the week outlining his plans for what he was going to cook for the family barbecue they were having in honor of Braeden and Anna and Eleanor.  The excitement with which our Washington family responded to their visit mattered a lot to Adam and me.  Adam summed it up simply: Family is amazing.

Jackson, Scott, Braeden, Brian and Kain

Rae and Ella

We miss them.

Braeden texted us with all the people he saw at church there, our friends who we also miss.

I was considering Relief Society yesterday though.  In my lesson, I ugly cried and talked about things dear to my heart that I would never have talked about if those ladies weren't my people.

Several of them came up and hugged me after the lesson.  A few sent me texts later in the day.

What a wonderful world it can be!  Aren't we lucky to have each other?

 

Grateful Friday

I'm grateful the weather is cooling off a bit.  Stick a fork in me, I'm done with summer.

I'm grateful that there is nothing wrong with hope.  My mom has some health concerns, I have some health concerns (I've moved on from arthritis to thyroid trouble--apparently 49 is the year it all falls apart for me, but it is also the year I got a granddaughter which is a fair trade), Mark has ongoing hassles.  Whether he accidentally gets gluten or his pump malfunctions, it's always something.  My mom is a fighter and she messaged her plans and said, "so we are still trucking."

We are.  We are in it to win it!

I'm grateful for the heartwarming experience of seeing pictures of Braeden and Company's adventure to Washington.

Seeing these pictures made us all wish we were at Grandma Geri's too.

Braeden sent a photo with the iconic apple.

It is heavy and amazingly has not given any child a head injury yet.  Every kid in the family has played with it; no one has died.

Braeden also sent this photo of a photo of Adam with the apple.  It's been around awhile!

Later in the day, Stephanie sent me this picture:

It made me so happy!  I love that I have dear friends in the world who love my kids and my kids love them right back.  

They sent this picture from a Thai restaurant in Vancouver.  I love that you can see Talia in the mirror reflection.  Two of my favorite redheaded girls!  (The jury is still out on Eleanor's hair color, but if it is red, I won't be sad!)

Braeden and Anna are going to the Mariners game while they are there and Janet is watching Eleanor.  Braeden knows enough to know what good hands she'll be in.

Last night, Adam had a work thing and Mark went with me to my school to rearrange desks.  I'm always one perfect desk arrangement away from controlling the chaos (delusion runs deep).  I drew a diagram on the board and he said, "How about put him next to him?"  No.  "Next to her?" No.  "But maybe it's a boy/girl thing and they won't talk."  That's not a thing in third grade.  

We kept discussing and he suggested the tattle tale should go in a strategic spot (good idea!) and I think we made it work.  They're going to be completely civilized now. (Again, delusion runs deep.)

I'm grateful I have Mark!

Labor Day weekend

I am here with two purposes:  one to record our trip to CA and one to avoid getting another text from Marianne that begins, "OK sister..."

We went to California on Friday night.  We had an 11:00 PM flight.  I may never recover.  I'm a toddler who needs her bedtime preserved.

Security isn't terrible that time of night.  Also, it always feels like insult to injury that Mark is met with such suspicion at the airport.  He can't go through the scanner with his pump, so it feels like the logical conclusion is that he must be a terrorist.  He is patted down very thoroughly and they even swab his hands to see if they are covered in explosives.  

I always just bite my tongue even though I want to say something snarky.

Braeden picked us up at the airport and it was so good to see him.  He swoops me up in the tightest hugs and I forget how much I need those hugs.

We stayed at a hotel and Braeden retrieved us again the next morning to take us to the airport to get the rental car.  We went to their apartment and enjoyed getting acquainted with Eleanor.  We went to the Davis Farmer's Market and a great used book store.

I had brought a stack of books for Eleanor and had put some in everyone's suitcase:

Some of them were surplus from school and some of them were gifted to me by a kindergarten teacher.

At the bookstore, I said, "Hey, we have room for more books since we brought those for Eleanor."

Adam amended my statement, "You have room for books."  Apparently he wasn't willing to be an accomplice to a book buying spree.

I bought some books anyway.

(And fit them all in my suitcase, so there.)

I had a flare up of my eye disease (because that's always fun).  I didn't bring enough medicine (I'm supposed to take 5 pills per day when I have a flare up), so I called my doctor and had a prescription sent and it was a whole ordeal and Adam took over getting it accomplished.  He even drove to the Walgreens in Sacramento where the prescription was sent.

He's always the MVP (even when he won't take extra books in his suitcase).

We had lunch at Black Bear Diner and Eleanor was masterfully handled by her parents.  She is busy and loves to stand and just pitches her body toward anything she wants.  Here she wanted a glass of water so she just flung herself on the table.  

She is tenacious, that one!  She is also incredibly darling and I love watching Braeden and Anna team up to provide an idyllic life for her.

We spent the rest of the day in their air conditioned apartment.  I read to Eleanor.

She loved this book and would get really excited and bounce up and down and grab at the pictures.  Other books she would just grab and chew on them.  

I miss her.

In the evening, Eleanor went to sleep and Braeden went with us back to our hotel to swim.  He was jumping in his car and I said, "Don't you need a swimsuit?"  

He said, "I keep one in my car."  Like you do....

Adam and the boys swam and I read my book.  The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Sunday we went to church with Braeden and Anna and Eleanor.  Eleanor was really and truly comfortable around us by then and Adam or I held her during sacrament meeting.  I loved their diverse little ward.  The sacrament was blessed in Mandarin.  Braeden and Anna have a friend named George who was recently baptized.  (Braeden was supposed to baptize him, but it was on the day Anna was giving birth.)  George is in his 80s and is blind.  Braeden and Anna pick him up for church and love him.  He was sitting behind us in the chapel and I overheard a young man, who was passing the sacrament whisper, "George, would you like the sacrament?"  "Give me your hand and I'll guide you."

It warmed my heart.

I got Eleanor duty during Sunday School which is the best kind of duty.  After church, George came over to their apartment too and we had homemade pizza.  Braeden had me sit and chat with George while he worked on the pizza.  George is completely personable and has clearly had a rough life.  He's lived here there and everywhere and doesn't have any family.  When he found out I'd grown up in Nevada, he told me that he'd lived in Winnemucca awhile.  He had been hitchhiking through and had stopped and worked washing dishes at a casino for several months.

He would ask me about my family and my childhood and my siblings and my children and my parents and he kept marveling at how fortunate I was.  "What a good life!" he said, over and over.  "What a good life!"

I had to agree with him.

Monday, everyone (except me) went swimming at the hotel.  I declared myself there to take care of Eleanor when she was tired of swimming.

But it was hot.  So I changed into my swimsuit and went swimming too.  For me, it has to be really hot to make swimming worth it.  For the rest of my family, there needs to be a body of water available.

I think Eleanor falls in line with the rest of them.  She was a little unsure of the cool water at first:

But soon, she was a happy little fish:

When Braeden was 5, we made a deal with him that he would get a Happy Meal if he would go off the diving board at the pool at Forest Park.  It was a big deal because we were poor and Happy Meals were few and far between.

He was doing underwater somersaults in the pool like his Grandpa Linn taught him.  I said if he could do five in a row I would buy him a Happy Meal.  He did six.

The rest of the day was spent hanging out in the apartment with the AC, lunch at Red Robin, where Eleanor was angelic, and a visit to Target.  My grandma sent them money for clothes and they were thrilled to buy Eleanor some cooler weather clothes for their trip to Washington.  

The Happy Meal wasn't the only childhood throwback.  Earlier they had been talking about how Braeden would never forgive me for getting rid of his Yu-gi-oh Duel Disc Launcher.  (You devote your life to your children and they fixate on the junky toy you threw away....)  It put them in a Yu-gi-oh mood apparently because Mark bought some cards at Target (Braeden already had some--at least I hadn't thrown them away.)  They played Yu-gi-oh.

Adam and I took turns cuddling Eleanor.  I loved how she would nudge her head up to Adam for a kiss.  She is 100% a keeper and it broke my heart to leave her behind.  I told her maybe her parents wouldn't notice if she came home with us.

Anna told me they'd notice.

All too soon we headed to the airport.  I realized on my boarding pass that we were in first class.  Adam is the guy who just quietly does stuff like that to make life better.

I asked him, "Why are you so good to me?"

He smiled and asked, "Why are you so needy?"

We walked and walked and walked in the new and unimproved Salt Lake airport after we landed.  I was SO tired and I just wanted to go to bed and I knew I'd have an early morning.  The airport is all about the hike now.

We got to the curb and there was a huge (think Space Mountain at Disneyland) line for the parking shuttle.  Adam led us on another LONG walk to the parking lot.  We had no idea if it was faster or not and we decided that since we were already doing it, we'd just assume it was faster.  

In for a penny, in for a pound.

Mark was incredibly upbeat the entire walk and kept encouraging us and it was disarming and out of character and needed.

In the car, he played just the music we needed to get us home.  That was very much in character.  We made it home!

I'm still tired.

It was so worth it.

I love Braeden and Anna and Eleanor.

As George proclaimed, "What a good life!"

Grateful Friday

Yesterday after school, Emily and I were talking in the hall.  She said that we needed to nip the behavior in the bud before it got worse for one of the students we share.

I asked, "Which student?"  There are several.

She told me.

I asked, "Which behavior?" There are several.

We talked about how we are about to lose our ever loving minds.  Michelle, the school counselor stopped by and chimed in.  She said we have to be firm.  Mean even.  She said, "Don't smile."  Then she grinned because she knew she was asking the impossible.

I told her some of what I am up against.

She said, "We are in trouble if Thelma is stressed.  You are always so calm and in control."

That is when I realized there was perhaps a disconnect between the Thelma at school and the Thelma that cries at home.  (Sorry, Adam.)

It did make me feel understood to chat briefly with my friends.  It is a safe space and also a loving space because none of us dislike these kids.  We all want the best for them and we work together to try to figure it out.  

I'm grateful for my fellow teachers.

I'm grateful Adam came home last night.

I'm grateful we are going to California tonight (waaaaaay past my bedtime).

I'm grateful I get to walk with Clarissa.

I'm grateful for the love and support and prayers of my parents and siblings.  Feeling loved is sometimes all you need.

Plowing on

If one more person tells me I have a hard class, I will kick them in the shins.  I know.  Compared to my third grade team, I have the most English learners, the most kids who go to special ed., the most kids who go to speech, the lowest test scores on our beginning of year tests (reading and math!).

I know.

The classes were balanced once upon a time, but the ones who moved away and the ones who moved in unbalanced them.

I'm working on it.

I will keep working on it.

Adam's coming home tonight and I'm glad because I'm coming apart at the seams a little without the balance he gives me.  

Tomorrow evening we're going to California to visit out baby (and fine, her parents too).

Every little thing's going to be all right.