Humming along

Yesterday I picked my mom up from her treatment in the morning and we went to lunch.  We had a bit of time before we needed to go to Fallon for another appointment, so I said, "Let's drive over and look at the capitol building." It was a few blocks away.

The same mom who arranged for us to have behind the scenes tours of McDonalds, the police and fire stations, and the bakery at Albertsons one summer when we were taking swim lessons in Elko, pulled a pamphlet out of her bag that outlined a tour of historic mansions in downtown Carson City.

I loved it.  I'm a sucker for old homes.  My mom would read me a brief description of each home, complete with what ghosts were said to haunt them.  

I would take any of those gorgeous houses, ghosts and all.

Neither of us are all that good at directions and we would both look at the map and try to make sense of what we were doing.  It was OK though, because we had time.

We drove to the hospital in Fallon to meet with a surgeon about getting a port.  Everyone at the hospital was very kind and once they knew my mom's last name, it was a who's who of the Dahl family. The surgeon went to school with several of my cousins and was listing all their names and he said, "And everyone knows Harvey Dahl."

I imagine he meant my cousin Harvey Dahl who grew up in Fallon and ended up playing for the NFL, but a lot of people know Harvey Dahl my larger than life grandpa too, so it works either way.

The lady who walked us down to the surgical center where we needed to fill out forms told us the Dahls she knew and that lady who talked us through all the prep for the surgery went to school with my cousin Molly.

My mom is getting the port tomorrow morning and we are glad.  It's been a struggle to get one arranged and she needs it to continue her treatments.

Our whole family is praying for her and I feel like our prayers are being answered in little ways all along.

I am enjoying my time with her: my pleasant and kind and faithful mother, who may or may not have information about historic mansions in the area in her bag.

My mom

My mom has me help her wrap her arm, where she has her midline, before she showers.  She brought left handed scissors for me to use to cut the tape.

She elevates motherhood to a whole new level.

I took my mom for her treatment yesterday.  She wanted me to come in so she could introduce me to everyone.  I think they probably had little interest in meeting me, but I dutifully went inside.  I'm glad I did, because what I saw was my mom shining her light in every direction.  She greeted everyone by name.  She introduced me, "This is my middle daughter."  They all met Olivia last week; next week they'll meet Marianne.  It's kind of a billy goat gruff situation.

We walked into the room where two other women were sitting in recliners, huddled under fleece blankets, hooked up to complicated IVs.  My mom cheerfully said, "Hello friends!"

She instructed me to sit down and visit.  She asked them all about their Thanksgivings and their families and she knew the details of their lives.  One of the women, who is here alone, told her all about a National Geography documentary she had watched and my mom acted fascinated.  Besides introducing me to them, she didn't say one word about herself.  She was only interested in them.

When my mom and I were driving here on Sunday we talked about how people become more like their spouses as time passes.  (I was once again grateful for Anna.) 

Joan was very dirty from Starr Valley and I told my mom, Adam would go find a carwash.  Then after I left her at the doctor's office, I decided to go and find a carwash.

My mom is right about most things.

Live from Carson City

Last week Olivia had the same blogpost title and this week is my turn.  I am in Carson City with my mom.  We had a nice trip, visiting and listening a little to the Follow Him podcast.  We couldn't have had better weather, which was good because it had snowed in previous days.

I also had a good weekend.  Yesterday when we were packing up, I told Adam, "I feel sad every time we leave here."  And it's true.  It is restful and happy there.  

In backwards order, my mom taught Relief Society and I was happy to be in her lesson.  I love the Wells Ward.  They've stopped acknowledging me as a visitor and I like that.

Our kids went home Saturday night with Clarissa.  She wanted to practice her songs for the Tabernacle Choir, but like Adam said, our kids are really good at tuning people out.  I think they were happy with their headphones and music.

Also on Saturday night, Robert and Marianne and Carolina came over.  Carolina wanted to hear our courtship and engagement story.  You've never had a more enthusiastic and captive audience.  It was fun to recount it for her.  I am forever grateful Adam and I ended up together and I loved the ways that Marianne and Robert are entwined with our story. 

Then we played Qwixx.  Always a good time, especially when paired with the Yacht Rock playlist on Amazon music. 

Speaking of playlists, I finessed my Christmas playlists on Saturday.  Christmas playlists are not to be taken lightly and I have 5 so I am ready for whatever mood strikes.  Adam and I went to Elko on Saturday and bought some heat tape for our roof (the ice!  the snow!).  We also bought more pins for those ring ding ornaments because I am a masochist and decided to make more to use the rest of the sequins.  

Friday we had Thanksgiving leftovers dinner at Marianne's.  I went over early to help her and she was all ready to go. 

She is a precrastinator.  I get it.

So that's me, up to date.  I am happy to be with my mom, happy to be enjoying a bit of leisure away from school and grateful for this holiday season.

Grateful Friday

Hours late because I woke up with a migraine.

I don't know about the migraine.  I am generally feeling so much better after my physical therapy and also still having migraines sometimes.

I'm still feeling grateful today (mostly because I'm finally feeling a little better).

We had a very good Thanksgiving.  It was a combination of Marianne is amazing and many hands make light-ish work.  (I was pretty tired when it was all said and done.)

Olivia and Adam and I took a walk in the morning and then Olivia and I went and helped at Marianne's a little but she was pretty much ready.  Hyrum said she had been baying for blood at 9:00 AM and got her children helping.  They are a lot of help and she is a great leader.

We all gathered for lunch a bit after noon. Everything looked and tasted fabulous.

Olivia and her boys had made these darling pumpkin place cards.

I was very grateful for the carefully thought out gluten free designations.  It makes me feel loved.  The whole day made me feel loved.  I enjoyed being with my people.  After we ate, we made our ornament craft that I had come up with which was painstaking and sort of annoying, but everyone was nice about it.  We had our talent show and I cried during a poem Clarissa shared she had written and that didn't help me not cry during two family history stories Adam and I wanted to share (we wisely had Mark read them).  

And I was impressed by those talented kids.  Marianne and I both lectured Olivia and Tabor for chatting in the corner during it.

Once an older sister....

After that we played Nauvoo bingo.  I was sitting between the troublemakers, Olivia and Tabor this time and we had a good time.  We had a Ghanian and Venezuelan guest for Thanksgiving (an Argentinian too, but he had left by then) and they played Nauvoo bingo with us.  I wondered if they would think this is something all Americans did on Thanksgiving and Tabor said the Venezuelan was probably grateful he didn't understand most of us.

Ammon was the Bingo caller (he stepped in once Enoch moved--although we miss Enoch and Jennifer and family!) and he called in both English and Spanish.  Everyone got a prize when they got bingo and everyone got a prize when they got blackout.  Then my mom told everyone to take one more prize.

It's no wonder everyone is very enthusiastic about Nauvoo bingo!

We pulled out all the food and ate dinner and I was not even a little bit hungry, but I didn't let that get in my way.  Everything was just so delicious!

Yesterday morning I took a picture out the window.

This morning I took a picture out the same window.

Snow fell in time just for my Christmas playlist.

Adam took the kids to town to go to a movie with their cousins and he is going to do some shopping and I am in a quiet house surrounded by snow and quiet and I am not sad about it.

Grateful for my family

Yesterday Mark and I drove to The Home Place (rebranded, it's a semi long story).  We had a nice drive and he kept us in good music.  When we got here there were flies to clean up (and my dad had already cleaned most of them) and all the stuff to bring in and Mark was vacuuming and hauling stuff and helping me make beds and he set up the internet and then sat down to work on the forms for his job he will start in January.

Adult children are kind of a marvel.  They go from grudgingly doing what you ask to saying, "What can I do?"

The grudgingly doing what you ask is still fresh enough that I appreciate this new stage!

Clarissa and Robert were out on a walk and they stopped by to say hello.

We went over to visit my dad and Katie and Charlotte (they were there as Charlotte is recovering from a tonsillectomy.  I got my mixer lamp and helped my dad vacuum a few flies.  He said, "No, you can't!" and I asked why not and he said, "Because I don't want you to!"

I said that wasn't a good enough reason and I owed him.  There are more flies than usual this year and if you live in a wooden house, you vacuum flies.

My mom and Olivia were driving home from Carson city and I invited my parents and their guests for dinner.  "Not you," I said to Olivia.  I didn't have enough.

Emma and Adam arrived later and I loved that we were all together.  Mark and I had FaceTimed with Braeden and QE earlier and we miss them and Anna, but I am grateful for modern technology that keeps us in touch.

We cooked some frozen pizzas (a dinner invitation to our house is never that fancy, especially here) and my parents, Katie and Charlotte and Ammon's family came over.  They had just arrived from Utah.  They had already eaten or we would have had really small pizza pieces!

It was nice to visit with everyone.  

I love being here and it is beautiful, but the main reason is family.  This place wouldn't mean as much to me without memories of my grandparents and growing up here.  Also every visit here is immeasurably enhanced by family.  I love visiting and having visitors and being interconnected to people I love so much.

Today we will all gather at Marianne's.  I told my dad yesterday that I would have wanted her as the oldest child too.  Whatever planning in heaven for that was a good idea.

We will miss the ones who aren't there and enjoy the ones who are.

I am also grateful for Adam's family and I think fondly of the Thanksgiving days we spent with them.  I feel doubly blessed in the family department.

When Mark and I drove yesterday we talked about the ways he is like both grandpas and Emma is like both grandmas.  

They could do so much worse!

Here is my grandma Jaynes's mixer in my grandma Dahl's kitchen that my dad made possible with an idea I got from Adam's mom.

I couldn't be happier about it.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Grateful for my job

I love the place where I work.  I love that I have real friends there.  It's not super easy for me to make real friends, but when I do, I don't really ever let them go.

I love real friends.

I love that there is a Christmas tree in the teachers' lounge with ornaments that are part of a giving tree for some of our students.  I love that you have to get them early before they are gone.

I love that Miriam came back to visit yesterday during lunchtime and she was swarmed with hugging teachers.  She cried when she hugged me and I almost but not quite kept myself from crying too.  It was just so good to see her and so good to see that she is on a healing trajectory.

I took a picture when she was swarmed with her students.  They said things like, "I've missed you!" so sincerely and earnestly that it melted my heart.

I love the connections we make with these little people who frustrate us but also wind their way tight around our hearts.

I love my students.  They are funny and brave and aggravating and smart and frustrating and lovable.

I love that we had a party after school for Elsa who is going to stay home with her baby boy and for Maren who is going to have a baby.  Jamie spearheaded the party so everything was beautiful and amazing.  Someone asked if they could hire her to cater their children's weddings and she said, "I'm not for hire."

We are so lucky to have her for free.  She is my go to for everything and I love that her office is around the corner from my classroom and she always has advice and cold soda and candy and nuts and Advil and pretty much anything you could need.

I love that Jordan said at the party, "Well look who the cat dragged in!" and in walked our old principal Jami, who we all love.  It was great to see him and great to have Matt now too because he is such a good principal and what we need.

When Matt sees me, he always asks, "Thelma, how are you?" Last week I told him I had a grievance.  I said, "It's not about you."

He laughed and said "Is this a it's not you, it's me?"

It was more about last year, but he committed to solving the problem.

I could go on and on, but I need to get on the road with Mark for our adventure that awaits.

Just, I love where I work.  I love the people I work with.

Life is good.

Gratitude

Yesterday I called our bank because we had a kerfuffle with an online bill payment.

They said, "You're not even authorized to pay bills online."

I said, "Well I do.  All the time."

They said, "You haven't signed into the bank for over ten years."

I said, "I sign in as my husband."

"That is against policy," was the very curt reply.

I said, "We have a joint account."

"Doesn't matter.  You have to sign in as you.  Oh, and you will have to re-enter all the information for each place you pay online."

I said, "OK, I will do that. Can I just ask you my question?"

He said, "Is your husband sitting there next to you?"

I said, "No."

He said, "Then I can't answer any of your questions."

Ugh.  So that was a pain.  But I created a new sign in (ten years ago is apparently an eon so I had to start from scratch).  When I was all signed in with my newly minted password and security questions, I got the message that I was not authorized to have online bill pay.

I called the bank again. And if you think it is easy to get to an actual person, it isn't.  I finally found a person.  She listened to me and said in a sort of patronizing way, "I can get you set up!  I will walk you through it."

It wasn't like I didn't know how to use the internet.  It said I wasn't authorized.

She said, "Oh, it says you aren't authorized."

So now she saw the issue.  She said, "Just a minute, let me look into this."

She came back and said, "You are not authorized because you aren't a tax owner."

"What does that mean?"

"You aren't the primary account holder so even though you have a joint account, you can't do online bill pay."

I said, "So I can't access my money?!?"

She was really nice about it.  She said, "Yeah, that seems really weird.  Let me see if I can ask more about this."

She came back and checked on me.  "I'm still working on this."

I felt like I was in Victorian times and had no rights because I was a woman.  I said, "Don't other people have joint accounts?  This seems crazy."

She said, "I know."

Finally she came back and said, "It may reset overnight.  Try again tomorrow."

I said, OK and that's an hour of my life that I won't get back.  When I told Adam about it, I said, "What if you were in some grievous accident and were unconscious.  I just couldn't use the bank?!?"

He said, "Well, you should be taking care of me and not worrying about things like that."

I didn't think he was very funny.

He also said, "If we have to, we'll close the accounts and set up something else that we can both access."

Yesterday I told my students about the magic of gratitude.  I told them that being thankful for what you have helps you feel happier if you don't have something you want.

I had them hold up their hands.  I said, "Look at that!  You have two hands!  Some people don't have two hands."

I think gratitude helps even when you're in a frustrating loop of phone conversations that have no resolution.

I'm grateful that the lady at the bank was very nice and helpful.  I'm grateful that I am not in actual Victorian times and I can get this worked out.  

I'm grateful I have two hands.