Wednesday, May 6, 2015

When errands get intimidating

After Braeden's Eagle Board of Review, we were told that the paperwork had to go to "National" and then when they sent it back, we could proceed with the court of honor.

We got the phone call.  The Eagle had landed.

I went to the scout office.  I was directed to follow a woman who was leading a procession up several flights of stairs to where all the district cubicles were.  She delivered us each to our appropriate district people.  As we wound our way through the catacombs, I thought, "How many scout troops are there around here?"

Then I realized.  Probably at least three for every church spire you see.  So a lot.

I got Braeden's certificate and then entered the scout store.

Cue scary music.

It is about ten times bigger than the one in Everett, which is the only other scout store I've ever been in.  I couldn't find anything or make sense of anything.  It might as well have been an auto parts store.  I tried to ask one of the militant employees.  (I don't know, put a scout uniform on a grown person and suddenly they take themselves really seriously.) I was told I had to wait in the serpentine line of people waiting at the register, then I could ask my question.

The scout store is one of those places like the post office or airport security.  The customer isn't right.  The employees are right.  You know it and they know it.

I laid my problem out to the store employee:  I'm clueless.  She started slapping things on the counter that I needed.  She peppered me with questions I didn't know the answer to.  She showed me what I needed to purchase for my Eagle and what was the most "popular" option of everything.  It was dizzying.  She directed me towards the additional gifts I could purchase for him for the occasion (I took a pass) and we breezed by the Eagle themed paper plates and napkins and cups and crepe paper decorations.  (Nah, I'm good.)

The woman in line ahead of me had also been in pursuit of things for her Eagle scout.  She was particularly interested in the Eagle themed picture frames but they seemingly didn't have anything ostentatious enough for her.  I don't even know how much money she spent but she was pretty much into the whole thing.

At one point she said, "Getting my son's Eagle scout award was harder than giving birth."

Having done both, I had one question for her (unasked because when have I ever struck up conversations with strangers?):

Just what kind of amazing drugs did you have when you gave birth?

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