One of my students sat across my desk from me yesterday and asked, "Is it hard to have curly hair?"
Did she mean, "Is it hard to live up to expectations?"
Maybe she meant, "Is it hard to achieve curliness with your hair?"
Or, "Is it hard to walk around looking like that all day?"
Every day is a new adventure.
Saturday morning I woke up crying from my dream. That's an illustrious way to begin a day (or a blogpost). I was dreaming that Braeden was leaving home.
I told Braeden about the dream and he said, "Usually when you wake up from a bad dream, you can feel relieved that it was only a dream, but not that one."
Nope.
The reality is that not only has Braeden left home, but his equally traitorous siblings have as well.
Sunday night was no better on the dream front. I dreamt that my friend, Jamie, and I were in an elevator at school (there isn't one) and there was some kind of malfunction and the elevator tipped over and ended up upside down. When we were finally rescued, Jamie went to the hospital, but I went back to my classroom because I had left my class alone (while I was joyriding in the non-existent elevator?).
When I woke up from that dream, I realized that the headache I had in the dream was not in fact from being upside down, but from the bump I got on my head when we landed, because I hadn't stayed upside down.
Slowly, it dawned on me that it had been a dream.
I don't know what any of this says about my mental state, but I remember very few of my dreams, so when I remember them, I guess I blog about them....
Besides my wacky dreams, we had a pretty good weekend. A highlight for sure was going to the Orem temple with Mark to do baptisms. He baptized and confirmed me. The temple was beautiful and I loved the way I felt when we were inside and I loved being there with Mark and Adam.
Being in the temple with my children feels like all my dreams (the good kind) are coming true.
Adam and I, after careful deliberation, picked out a new Christmas tree for the living room. We wanted it fairly tall and quite skinny (but not too skinny) with warm white LED lights. Knowing what you want so specifically makes such hunts easier and harder, but we finally ended up with what we think is a winner.
I will love festooning it with red and white and straw ornaments.
Speaking of trees, when we were talking to Braeden and QE on Saturday we told them that we were on the hunt for a tree and QE said she wanted a pink Christmas tree. I sent her this picture.
I told Braeden, "Get the biggest aluminum Christmas tree you can find, Charlie Brown. Maybe painted pink! Do something right for a change, Charlie Brown!"
I don't think he'll listen to me.
At church on Sunday, Adam got up to close the meeting and said, "Part of my responsibility as bishop is to correct false doctrine when it is taught in sacrament meeting." There was the slightest intake of air in the room.
Adam continued, "Reddick said the bishop must hate him because he had to speak and he is teaching the lesson in priest's quorum, but the opposite is true."
I think I was the only person in the room who knew Adam well enough to not have a mini panic attack, thinking he was actually going to correct false doctrine right there in public.
Our ward choir resumed practicing yesterday and I went in solidarity with Emma because it means so much to her when people go to choir.
There were four of us who showed up. We struggled through one of the songs and the choir director said, "That was pretty."
The accompanist, who has what no one would consider a poker face, shook her head no and said, "Maybe it will sound pretty eventually."
It took all my self discipline not to start giggling because I knew I would never stop.
Later in the afternoon I caused chaos on Family Search by messing up some merges. I couldn't recreate what I had done because I hadn't written down ID numbers in my haste (I always write down ID numbers, but I was rushing because it was time to get ready for dinner). Silly sad Thelma. It felt even worse because it was Marie Louise's family I was messing with.
Our dinner guests came and we had a nice time. After they left, Adam cleaned up the kitchen and I called a Family Search helper. I explained my folly and she said, "Oh, I know. I have been there."
So kind.
It made me want to be like that, even when people are hasty with merges on Family Search.
A few days ago I was in the hall, stapling up haunted mansion that had multiplication arrays for windows, like you do in October. My stapler jammed and there was a bent staple stuck up inside and I couldn't get it out. It had happened once before and I took the stapler to my dad's shop.
Riley and another custodian were walking down the hall. I approached them just in time to hear Riley say, "God knew if I could read, I'd be unstoppable."
I have no idea what prompted that conversation....
I said, "Hey, do you have any tools to dislodge this staple."
He whipped out a big pocketknife and had the errant staple out in seconds.
***
Tabor and my dad went to The Home Place to try to find out where the mice were getting in. Tabor said he likes figuring out things like that. I told him I was extremely grateful. We talked on the phone a few times and texted and he told me my dad had a plan. He said, "You know how it is when he has a plan. I think you are in good hands."
My dad and his plans usually work out.
***
Yesterday some UVU students training to be firefighters came to give a presentation to the third graders. The leader of the group came up to me and said they needed the teachers to fill out a paper for each presenter, kind of a teacher evaluation. The dear boy (he was a big strong firefighter in training, but I felt motherly) had a faltering voice as he humbly asked me to fill out the paper and his hands were positively shaking.
The three trainees looked at the third graders, sitting on the gym floor chattering and bouncing in excitement, and they seemed unsure how to get it started.
In my best teacher voice, I said, "Bonneville."
90 children, in unison, said, "Broncos" and then were immediately silent. (It honestly doesn't always work that smoothly.)
In a weird role reversal where firefighters have my undying respect and appreciation for doing something I would never be brave enough to do, they were looking at me like, "How did she do that?"
They did a great job in their presentation. They had several kids come up to the stage and demonstrate stopping and dropping and rolling and show me an 8 year old who doesn't love that!
It has all left me feeling grateful that we're all so different. I don't think God prevented Riley from learning to read or he would be unstoppable, but I do know that He gave us each these diverse talents and interests and I will gratefully spend my days with the rambunctious third graders, knowing other talented people are doing their bit to make my world better.
What a good plan!
I guess angst is the flavor of the week. I was in a sort of bad mood when I met Emma at IKEA yesterday (a mood that was not improved by the craziness of 5:00 I-15). I started telling her about all the things while we walked and admired things. I kept interrupting myself to say things like, "Look at that pretty pillow!"
And then I would say, "I don't need any more pillows!"
"But look at that one!"
Then Emma would stop to point out something cute and eventually I got out all my tale of woe, but after seeing so many lovely things, it fell lessened.
Emma got some plates since hers are breaking right and left and she got a few other kitchen needs.
The main event for both of us was the Christmas stuff and a lot of it was out of stock! How is the temperature still in the upper 80s and IKEA is sold out of their Christmas stuff?!?
(I'm over temperatures being in the upper 80s btw.)
There was lots of pretty wrapping paper and since I use my calendar pages as gift wrap, I for sure didn't need any wrapping paper.
(I came home with five rolls.)
They did help my mood.
I enjoyed being with Emma. We ate meatballs and chatted the whole time. We decided I'd just buy the stuff and she could pay me back so we'd be more efficient at the checkout. I told Emma she was in charge of figuring out the money. I handed her the receipt and she said, "Oh."
All of our Christmas stuff (which was the bulk of what we bought) was all labeled Vinterfint....
We rounded numbers and made good guesses and checked a few item numbers and it would have been way easier to pay separately. I still enjoyed our time.
I love adult Emma. (I loved kid Emma too, but adult Emma is easier.)
I talked to Marianne on the way home and between the two of them, I felt considerably better. I am ready to go back and try again.
(Also, I got some cookies at IKEA so I don't need to stop at the store to get a treat for activity day! Winning all around!)
I get tired of having the same conversations at work about the same things. Complaining without offering solutions.
I'm guilty of the same.
I get tired of my messy desk. I am endlessly tidying it and it feels like several small bombs are detonated throughout the day. I am mid grading a stack and then something else interrupts. Someone hands me papers to distribute. They get added to the pile. A student needs help so I shove everything aside and invite them to sit down. I lose the copies I had prepared for different lessons.
I create systems and the systems fail me.
I am tired of the state/district/school giving me more to do. Take this canvas course, fill out this form.
This is turning out to be sort of like yesterday's blogpost, because happy things happen too.
Emma sent a text that warmed my little heart.
Sometimes I just marvel at how lucky I was to get these kids.
And then there's Follow Him. That podcast makes my day every time I listen to it.
I am grateful for our pleasant non-hurricane weather.
Good and bad. Frustrating and lifting. Mostly I'm just gloomy because I miss Adam.
October conference weekend is my favorite and I enjoyed every bit of it. I caught up on sleep and laundry, which was good.
Emma and Mark came over Saturday morning. I made Christmas ornaments for my students while Emma worked on a puzzle next to me.
We were kind of in a turf war for table space, but we cooperated.
After the first session, we piled in the van and got lunch and went to Costco in search of a Christmas tree for our living room. Adam convinced me that we were in Costco and the tree I was looking at was way bigger than it seemed.
I eventually believed him.
We found gluten free pizzas which they've been without lately so we bought four boxes.
We stopped at Trader Joe's and filled our cart with treats and wonders. I got pumpkin soup and pumpkin crackers and pumpkin joe joes and GF pumpkin pancake mix. Mark doesn't like pumpkin and I told him that it's because he's youngest and all the good genetic material (that liked pumpkin) was taken up. Adam told Mark he did, however, inherit all his wit and charm.
So there's that.
We enjoyed two more sessions of conference and Adam made pork chops and roasted vegetables for dinner.
After eating we had a music night that stretched for over an hour. Emma instructed us to pick a song that "took us on a journey" and another that was a "danceable bop." We texted our ideas to Mark, he played them and then we guessed whose songs were whose which wasn't even a little bit hard.
Then we kept saying, "Play this song!"
We told stories about which songs mattered to us and why. We talked about what they reminded us of. We danced in goofy ways and sang along to the songs. I gave them an anthology of the cassette tapes I cherished in the 80s.
Adam invented music night about 15-20 years ago and like most things he invents, we love it.
Sunday morning we had the GF pumpkin pancakes, which is the one pumpkin thing Mark likes. We received the sad news that Adam's uncle David had passed away and were comforted with words of faith and peace from listening to two more sessions of conference.
I'm sad conference is over.
I feel like the help and answers I was seeking were found.
Between sessions we talked to Braeden and went for a walk at the Pleasant Grove cemetery. It's a beautiful spot to walk. Catching glimpses of the Mt. Timpanogos temple through the trees as you walk through the cemetery feels like exactly what anyone could want.
A lovely weekend buoyed me and bolstered me and I'm ready for another week!
