For the love of the game

 Yesterday was a PD day at school and I came home with markedly more energy.  Sometimes I am reminded that teaching really takes it out of you!

I also wore my Esprit sweatshirt that Whitney so KINDLY sent me from Atlanta.  

I sent my sisters this text:

Olivia requested a picture and I would do anything for my sisters.  Here is me, happy in the knowledge that I think I'm way cooler than I actually am:

At the meeting in the library I was sitting across the table from sweet Oaklee, who is young and fresh-faced and I am old enough to be her mother.  She asked, "What does your shirt say?"

I said, "Esprit."

She had a confused look on her face.

I told her she was very young. Then I told her about it, but there's no way to adequately describe the joy this sweatshirt gives me.  To her credit, she had a supportive look on her face anyway.

Jamie, who is my same age, got it.  Later in the day, she gave me a sideways look and said, "And are you wearing your Swatch?"

Yes indeed.  It's nice to have a fellow Gen Xer in the building!

I went to Hobby Lobby during the Seahawks game last night.  At the check stand, the woman working said, "I like your sweatshirt!  I have the blue one.  I wanted that one, but I couldn't find it."

I told her my sister-in-law sent it from Atlanta.  

She squinted her eyes at me a bit and asked, "Are you old enough to know about Esprit?"

Slightly offended, I said, "Yes. I know."

Then she told me about the Esprit bag she bought back in the day.  I usually don't love chatting with cashiers, but I think we were friends by the end.

I also am as pleased as I can be with my house project:

When Emma was here on Sunday, I told her to go look in the living room.  All she noticed was that I'd moved the clock.  

Esprit, new curtains.  It's OK if not everyone gets it.

Weekend

 Friday morning, Geri headed home and I headed off to school looking like a clown.

Adam took my picture and I look goofy, but I guess that is the point.

Since it is the 50th anniversary of Bonneville and we are the Broncos, all the faculty and staff dressed in a rodeo theme.

I decided to channel my dad and I was a rodeo clown.

He arguably was more adventurous than me as a rodeo clown (you know, at actual rodeos), but I went to school on the day we were celebrating Halloween, so I was pretty adventurous too.

Here is a team picture.  I love these girls.

What are those enormous handcuffs looped over.  Stare at that inflatable jail for more than 5 seconds and you'll get confused.

Spirits were high.  One of the first items of business is the parade.  It is a good call, because as soon as the parade ends, children start shedding uncomfortable costumes and cheap components get lost/broken to the consternation of all.  I am not without adhesives though and I taped/glued some things back together.

I love the parade because I love seeing the adoring parents and grandparents who are so thrilled to see their kids.  Love in evidence is always a happy thing.  One of my students was wearing a ghillie suit (and yes, I googled how to spell that).  His mom was busily videoing a different student in an identical costume and my student said, "Hi Mommy!" She was super startled and it cracked him up.  He is a delightful boy and I love his sense of humor.

Another boy is pretty cool for school.  He was walking right past his parents, refusing to acknowledge them.  He is their youngest of six children and they don't take themselves too seriously.  They were yelling his name and his mom was saying, "It's your Mom!"  They looked at me and we smiled the smile of parental understanding. He stoically walked on, eyes ahead.

These same two moms came to help with our Halloween party.  They are great (and so are their boys).

One of my girls was overwhelmed by everything first thing in the morning and cried and refused to come in the classroom.  Katie, our wonderful school counselor, rallied around her.  My class was super curious because that is the only setting third graders seem to have.  I explained she was having a hard time and it would be best when she did come to class if they didn't make a big deal of it or ask her why she was gone.  I said, "Just be chill."

The little angels rose to the occasion!  I love them!  When she came into the room--having taken her costume off because it was too much for her--most of the other kids said nothing.  A few of them said, "Hi," and one girl came over and said, "Hey, I like your necklace."

She was immediately comfortable and I can't get over this class.  Can I just have them forever?

We got through the day.  During math, we did Monster Math, which I accidentally invented.  I would say, "We do the math..."

And they would yell back, "We do the monster math!"

Then I would give them a problem to solve.  Repeat, repeat, repeat.

They are easy to hoodwink into doing math when they think it's a game.

Trick or treat.

All week they work toward Fun Friday.  A few of them skeptically realized early in the week we would be having our party during usual Fun Friday time.  My team and I had already discussed because we didn't want them to lose motivation.  (Not the first rodeo for this clown.)  I told my students, "We are having Fun Friday, before the party."  Our Fun Friday was just a short recess (usually there are different activities they can choose from).  My plan was to let them all "earn" it, but I didn't tell them that until it was time for recess.  They all felt like they were getting away with something.

Trick or treat.

Four moms came and helped with the party and it was a fun time.  I manned a jack-o-lantern bean bag toss and I have twin girls who are pretty quiet and shy and they were both amazing at jack-o-lantern bean bag toss.  Hidden talents abound.

By day's end, I was exhausted and super ready to wash the makeup off my face! 

Adam picked up French dip sandwiches at Kneaders and we had a lovely quiet evening watching the Great British Baking Show.

Saturday morning began with Braeden calling to FaceTime with the inestimable young prince.  QE woke up and joined us.  Then Adam came downstairs and it was a great way to start the day.  

After the call, Adam and I were discussing the day and Adam mentioned he had some IKEA credits that were set to expire.  I told him that I had been contemplating curtains.  He said, "Let's go to IKEA."

So we did.

We are the yin and yang of spontaneity and I love that he can just pick up a plan at a moment's notice and run with it.  And I love going to IKEA, especially when they have their Christmas stuff.

I tried to explain it to Adam, and I don't know if I can 100% explain it, but after my cancer nonsense, I feel like reclaiming parts of me.  I mostly just survived it all, not having much time/energy for extra things.  To quiet the voice in my head that says, You can't, you have cancer.  Who do you think you are? I can do more than cancer and to prove it to myself, I wanted to do something and the living room has become my first victim.

So curtains.  There is life in the old girl yet.

We were looking at the curtains and I mistakenly thought we had 8 foot ceilings when we really have 9 foot ceilings.  (I don't know, they're just tall compared to me....) So when I saw the length of the curtains at IKEA, I told Adam they might pool on the floor a little.  

He said, "No!  I hate pooling curtains!  I don't even like curtains."

I told him that it was nice that he kept our marriage fresh after all these years because I had no idea he had such strong opinions about curtains.  I told him we could skip the curtains if he didn't want them.

He said they were fine.  And I promised I'd hem them.

So I bought some curtains.  Also, I told Adam I was growing as a person because I only bought a couple of Christmas things, although I thought it was all pretty.  Admire rather than acquire.  That was my mantra, because I already have too much stuff.

We stopped at Winco on the way home.  

Here is an aside, but when I was in high school, in FFA, we did a Safety Kids performance for the elementary students.  It was series of songs about personal safety (because it was the 80s and everyone was seemingly one scary white van away from getting kidnapped).  One of the songs, for when you got lost said to, "Look for a grandma or mother with children."

Well, this nana got called up.  

At Winco, we load the groceries onto the belt, Adam puts them in our Mary Poppins reusable shopping bags that will seriously hold everything and Adam regularly tests that assertion.  My job is to pay.  We are a well oiled machine.

But I saw a little boy, about 4-5 years old come out of the bathroom.  He looked around, increasingly panicked.  He started calling, "Dad!  Daddy?!?"  Then he started going toward the exit.  I told Adam he needed to pay.  As I approached the little boy, his face crumpled in tears.  He said, "Where is my dad?!?"

I held out my hand and coaxed him to come with me.  I said, "We'll find him."

We went to customer service and there was a guy who didn't really know what to do (and why isn't that the first thing they teach you in customer service training?).  A rough looking woman in an indeterminate costume grunted OK and told the guy to make an announcement.  They asked the boy his name and he just cried.  I got down next to his face and he told me his name.  

They were about to make the announcement, then I guess the training kicked in?  They said, "Oh! We need the dad's name."

Again nothing from my little friend.  I got down next to him again and he told me his dad's name.  In her gravelly voice, the woman said, "You can leave him here."

I wasn't about to leave my little charge.  Hearing the announcement, the dad poked his head out of a check stand line.  I pointed him out to the little boy and he ran for it.

It made me happy to be a grandmother, securely in the non-threatening demographic.  Lost children of the world: look for a grandma or mother with children! 

When we got home, Adam got right to work installing the curtain rods, which are a pain.  Molly screws, finicky finials, opinionated wife.  I called Mark up from the basement and that was a boon.  I am very happy with the curtains.  Also, since I was wrong about our ceiling height, no pooling.  I need to finish attaching the valances to the blinds, but I will post a picture when they are all finished.

I appreciate the love and service of my dear husband who doesn't like curtains.  He loves me.  And I love him.  More than curtains.

As if he weren't already MVP of the weekend, Adam changed all the clocks so when I woke up Sunday morning, they were done!

Grateful Friday

 The past few days have given me enough to be grateful for that I can muster some courage for today.  Halloween celebrations for school are scary, which I guess is on brand for the holiday.

Wednesday two good things happened.  Adam came home, always a good thing.  Also, we had our ward trunk or treat in our cul-de-sac.  The fact that it was in our driveway/cul-de-sac is 100% the only reason I went.  I don't love Halloween and I mostly love being where the people aren't.  But I had a good time!  I have a lot of good friends and it was fun to visit with them.  The primary children shyly--and not so shyly--came up to me to show me their costumes and I love that I'm getting closer to them.

It was all exhausting for the weak little link that I am, but I enjoyed it.

Yesterday was a good day at school.  I love talking to my friends.  I am getting to know the 4th grade teachers better all the time and I really like them.  We have this big thing in common: school teacher.  It is fun to connect about other things too.

After school we had a Finer Things Friday.  We have one a month.  Since today is our Halloween celebrations and no one will feel like anything that doesn't include a dark silent room, we had it on  Thursday.  Jamie had set up a mocktails bar and it was amazing, like everything Jamie does is.  I decided to skip the bottleneck of drink makers and opted for a bottle of butter beer. (See what I did there?  Bottleneck vs. bottle.) Delicious. I sat amongst my friends and we were all chatting and laughing and having a great time.  We talked about everything from school to travel to labor and delivery stories.  You know, like you do.

I am grateful for that school and those people.

I had a buzzed up sort of day.  Braeden is confronting lots of Big Boy Decisions with his career.  At one point, I was walking down the hall to pick up my class from computers and mentally spiraling.  There is freaking out about yourself and then there is freaking out about your children.  It is a whole new level.

I felt this peace wash over me.  I remembered specific times when we were guided to know what to do.  The same will happen for them.  I know that.  God is in His heaven and He loves us.  What a gift it is to me that I know that.

I am grateful.

Delightful

 My cute niece Charlotte has been having a lot of headaches, which I hate.  But I love Charlotte.  They have been trying to get to the bottom of it with doctor visits, but so far have not solved the problem.  Tabor told Charlotte that until they figure something else out, she is going to have to "live with the headaches like so many of us do."

Charlotte said, "Maybe we can all take a group picture, you know like the Olivia pictures."

It delighted me right down to the ground.

Olivia (my sister) insists every time she is in the same room with Olivia (our niece) and Olivia (our aunt) that they take a picture.

At the Murray cemetery each Memorial Day, those of us who claim to look like our generously proportioned ancestor, Ellen Yorgason, pose for a shot by her headstone.

I like the idea of a headache sufferer group.

I thought about it yesterday morning when I woke up with an enthusiastic headache.  I think headaches are easier to bear when you consider you could be posing with others in a "we get headaches" photo, especially if Charlotte is in the group.

Maybe that's just me.

Third grade swear words are also sort of charming.

I have a student who says, "Oh biscuits!" when she makes a mistake.  A few years ago, I had a girl who would exclaim, "Daisies!" when she was unhappy.  Yesterday a boy said, "Holy sherbet!"

I hope they never change.

Early in the school year, I was trying to drive home the point that I love it when my students ask questions.  I said, "When I have a student say, 'I don't understand,' that is one of my favorite things."

At the time I was standing in front of the room and holding a marker.  I said, "My job is to teach you, not just hold this marker, so let me teach you. Tell me if you need help."

It has become a thing they love to repeat.  They love to tell me that I'm not just there to hold a marker.

Yesterday, a student gave me this drawing.  I loved it so much I hung it on the wall.  

She even drew base ten blocks!

Sometimes they are delightful even when they're naughty.  I have "treat sheets" in my class.  They are on colored paper, so they are easier to keep track of.  It is a review math worksheet that they take home, complete, and bring back for a piece of candy.  A boy made 23 colored copies on his parents' printer, sure that I would hand over a piece of candy for each page.

He said, "But I did all those pages."

I said, "You copied it after you finished."

He said, "No I didn't."

I said, "You did."

He said, "OK." and went back to his desk.

If his parents are wondering why they are fresh out of yellow ink, I may have an idea....

Not all doctors are the same....

 It's not like it's the only doctor's office around; I don't think I'm going back there.  

Yesterday I got an appointment at the urgent care at the doctor's office where I usually go.  When I checked in, there was a sign that said without an appointment, the wait time was 1 hour 3 minutes.

I think my appointment was a fiction, because I waited an hour before they called me back.  (Luckily, I had my book with me.)

The doctors take turns manning urgent care and my least favorite one was working.  He said something vague about it being kidney stones, but probably not.  What?!?

He said I definitely had an infection and he was going to give me an antibiotic and a backup antibiotic.  He said, "Why did you get this? Don't you drink enough?"

I told him I try to.  I told him I have lymphoma, so maybe that was why I got an infection?

He 100% had that info in my chart, but he clearly hadn't read it and he looked shocked.  He said, "Oh, then do you think we need to do a culture?"

I said, "I don't know."  (This is why I have come to you, medical professional.)

He hemmed and hawed and said, "I will give you two antibiotics."

He yawned an enormous yawn and asked again, "Should we do a culture?  I guess your insurance will cover it, since you're doing chemo?"

I didn't know what they had to do with each other, plus I had already explained that I was finished with chemo (plus, you know, my chart).  He said he decided to do a culture.

I said, "Do I still take the antibiotics?"

He said yes.

On my drive home, I realized he never told me the scenario that I would take the second antibiotics.  So I called back.

You'll never guess that I was put on an enormous hold.

I napped for an hour and a half in the afternoon.  

Besides that, I had an enjoyable conversation with Olivia.  It perked me up.  I sent Mark to get Papa Murphy's and I didn't really cook it all that well.  (I am not the pizza baker in the family and it shows.)  The three of us visited, Adam called, Braeden called, Emma had worked at our house because she was going to a friend's wedding in PG.  I sent her off wearing one of the necklaces my dad made my mom for the occasion.

Somewhere along that I started feeling better and I am going back to school today.  

The ups and downs of immunocompromised life....

Weekend

 We had a nice autumnal weekend.  I loved having Adam home.  He left again for a few days last night, but it is a short trip and he doesn't have too many more trips for this year.  I am so looking forward to falling into a routine of him home and nothing out of the ordinary happening.  Just us.

Sometimes boring sounds like the most delightful thing.

We went to the grocery store Saturday morning and swung by my classroom for a game board I wanted for primary.

Fabulously mundane.

In the afternoon we went to Sense and Sensibility.  Despite the comfy heated recliner seat, I didn't nap, so I felt pretty proud of myself.  I also felt proud of myself the night before when we were discussing the movie and Mark wasn't interested.  Geri said something about him not being a Mr. Darcy fan and Mark said, "I thought it was Sense and Sensibility?"

My boy knows Jane Austen and my work here is done.

I enjoyed the movie.  A few liberties were taken with the story, but I didn't mind.  

We took a walk at Harvey Park, then Geri treated us to dinner at La Costa.  It was a nice day.

Sunday was a cozy morning of getting ready for primary (but then I didn't actually do the music) and watching QEs primary program on zoom.  I even got to tune in to Boston's primary program briefly and watch him do his part.

Adam spoke in church and I enjoyed it.  He was pretty nervous and he is doing a presentation today in Las Vegas that he is also nervous about.  After church he said he now only had one pit in his stomach instead of two.

I guess that's moving in the right direction.

We had a nice Sunday afternoon.  The kids and I filled out our ballots, we had dinner, we had a Come Follow Me lesson, and we played Qwixx.

Mark took Adam to the airport, Emma went home and when Mark came back, he and Geri went downstairs to watch the Seahawks.  Mark said I could join.  I appreciated the invite, but more than that I appreciated going upstairs. 

I had a rotten night's sleep and I suspect I have a UTI.  So that's fun.  I got a sub and a doctor appointment.  It isn't the most auspicious start to a week, but hopefully things will improve.

Grateful Friday

 Yesterday was a cranky pants kind of day.  (Although I wore jeans.)

It was rainy and we had inside recess.  A boy crawled under my desk and cried because he didn't win the Blooket we played.  I told him if he wasn't old enough to not cry about Blooket, he couldn't play anymore.  He put his head inside his t-shirt, but he stopped crying.

Later in the afternoon two kids cried because they didn't have enough time to finish.  They had spent oodles of time in clipboard selection because they wanted to work somewhere beside their desks.

I hadn't slept well so I know my patience was thin.  That usually results in more fragile children, which is a losing cycle for all of us.  Between not being home last weekend to do the weekend things and trying to fit them all in this week, I've been stretched thinner than normal.

I have a pathetically small margin of stretch.  

I have a sore throat and my old friends, the mouth sores, back.  I need to rest in order for my life to work and that is discouraging.

I have a rock that a student painted in a rainbow and gave to me years ago.  I use it to prop open the door when I have recess duty.  A student complained that there was no purple in the rainbow and that is his favorite color.

I said, "One of my students gave it to me as a gift, so I didn't complain about it."

A girl said, "Also, she is a teacher and a grown up so she doesn't complain."

I am a grown up and I do complain.  I felt chastised.  I need to do better because no one likes a complainer.  

I went to recess duty and watched the children run and play and I watched the clouds dance across the stormy sky and I watched the mountains, red, yellow and brown, steadfastly looking over us.

I don't really have much to complain about.  I need to take care of my weak constitution, but my life is pretty great.  I had a student wear his bicycle helmet all morning because he wanted to.  After a while he came up to me and said, "If one more person asks me why I am wearing this, I might take it off."

I mean, these kids are nuts and they delight me.

I had a boy pull a tooth out during math.  I gave him a ziplock bag and he put it in his backpack and they all laughed at my jokes about him being a jack-o-lantern just in time for Halloween.  They are the easiest crowd to make laugh.  And several of them tried to pull out more teeth so they could also be jack-o-lanterns, but no one was successful

What really righted my ship is last night Adam and I drove to Salt Lake to meet up with Megan and Emma for dinner.  Megan is in town for a conference.  Driving to and from Salt Lake with Adam mended my soul up a bit.  It is good to be with him.

I am looking forward to a weekend.  Geri is here and we are planning to go to the new Sense and Sensibility movie and Adam will be here until Sunday night and I will soak that time up.

Also, I think we are securely in sweater weather and I love that.

I am grateful for my life and grateful for a blustery recess to remind me of that.