Weekend

I was talking to Adam about a school thing and he said, "What do you mean when you say fluency?"

When you get all entrenched in a thing, you use words that everyone who is also entrenched with you knows and understands.  So you start thinking everyone just knows what you're talking about.

(By the way, when I talk about literacy fluency, I am talking about the accuracy, speed, expression and smoothness all coming together to help with comprehension.)

Teachers may say rate for speed and prosody for expression, but that is what we're talking about.

My dad used to send me to Big A Auto Parts when I was in high school sometimes (which was my nightmare) and tell me to get something and if they didn't have it exactly how I was expecting, I was completely lost at sea.  I was not even a little bit entrenched in that world.

My dad started to just call them and tell them exactly what he needed.  So when my sisters or I went, we just had to track down who our dad had talked to.  It was still kind of horrible, but better.

Anyway.

Olivia asked what an underground dress up day was and I think that falls in this category--things you forget everyone doesn't know.  So let me explain.

An underground dress up day is when the teachers dress up in some way that we don't announce or explain to the students in any way.  We do it purely for our own enjoyment.  This year, different teams came up with different ideas and we will do one a month.  Are we full grown adults with actual lives and responsibilities?  Yes.  This is a little bright spot though, because teaching can be hard.  

Friday was a hard day at school.  There was a thunderstorm in the morning that lasted about an hour, which is unusual.  I don't think I've ever been in a thunderstorm that long.  There was lightning and thunder and hail and rain.  And it was hot and muggy in my classroom so I propped open the door.  Hail got on the floor inside and the kids were completely buzzed up by everything so I had to close the door.  Then I had to close the blinds, because, "Yes, I know.  Weather.  But let's do math."

We are learning about weather in science right now, so we did talk about the weather.  We discussed the clouds, the storm, which way it was moving, etc.

But then, math.  Math.  Please.

It was a lot.

During library, they announced that they were testing the fire alarms, so don't evacuate, but they would be going off.

That freaks them all the way out, but why not add to the crazy?!?

In the afternoon we celebrated a student's birthday.  Their parent had sent goodie bags: candy and pop its and those sticky hands that stick to the wall when you fling them.  So they were all flinging the hands at each other and it was complete chaos.  I declared everything had to go into backpacks and we tried to salvage the day in the 80 degree room with my depleted patience.

I had recess duty.  It started raining lightly and I popped open my umbrella and determined that I didn't want to go back inside with sweaty children for indoor recess. Also, I love my team enough that I wanted them to have 15 minutes of a break.  I decided that until a student came and complained to me about the rain, we would keep having recess.  A girl came up finally and said, "I'm getting wet."  We had two more minutes of recess so I invited her to stand under my umbrella.  She did for a few seconds and then ran off to play.

We made it to the end of the day and my team went to work in the office again because we were miserable.

In other news, we had a good weekend.  I was happy Adam came home on Friday.  He flew into Provo and stopped off at my school on his way home from the airport.  (It was my lunch break.) He had brought me a piece of chocolate cake from Portillo's.  

Believe me when I tell you it was the singular upside in my school day.

The rest of the weekend was good.  I was glad to be with Adam.  Along with Mark, we did some yard clean up in the morning on Saturday.  We needed to cut out some dead branches and errant plants.  I really wanted to prune something with our electric hedge trimmer because using that thing is my love language.  Everything mostly needs to be pruned in the late winter/early spring.  Rats.  We have a dwarf dogwood bush in the front that was growing over the sidewalk.  I trimmed it and it looks pretty bad because now there is this bald spot on no leaves where I trimmed.  I said, "Oh no."

Mark asked me what was wrong.  Adam said, "Your mom just really wanted to trim something."

My dad called, so I stopped to talk to him, which also saved the rest of our bushes from my enthusiasm.

We went to a convert baptism in our ward and it was so happy.  I loved being there.

The rest of the day was just typical Saturday stuff, but I was glad Adam was there all day long.

I am embracing autumn.  I bought pumpkin body butter and hand cream, an apple candle, pumpkin spice almonds and pretzels and GF pumpkin pancake mix at Trader Joe's.  I'm here for all of it.

On Sunday, we practiced for the primary program.  Our small little primary has about 12 children there every week, but it is most often not all the same 12.  It makes it really hard to teach them the songs.  Yesterday, I brought the posters I had made when I realized they don't know the songs.  Sam, who is my partner led the singing and I held up the posters.  I had bought flip charts from Etsy for each of the songs and glued them to the posters.  I did two out of order, because of course I did.  I held up one poster quickly because it was the next verse, and it was upside down.  At least it lightens the mood?

As soon as Adam got home from church, we packed up a picnic and headed to Salt Lake City.  We met Emma at Liberty Park and ate.  We brought sandwiches and salads and grapes and chips and Emma brought some GF cookies she had baked and it was a feast.  The weather was sublime in the mid 70s and it was a beautiful day.  I took Adam to the airport and Emma and Mark went back to her apartment.  The plan was for me to join them, with a potentially harrowing parallel parking situation.  I have successfully avoided parallel parking for most of my life.  Emma had said she would come outside and park for me if I needed her to, but I ended up being able to just pull in which was a relief.  

I enjoyed being in Emma's lovely little apartment.  I love the many ways she has made it her own.  We played a cut throat game of Phase 10. After I threatened Christmas presents, Mark started cheating for me.  I still didn't win.

I am ready for another week of school in the muggy swamp.   I only have three days this week because I have my immunotherapy on Thursday and I am staying home Friday as well.  I hope it will give them time to figure it out at the school, but I am not holding my breath.

Grateful Friday

I love how much my students love good books I read them and also good stories we read together.  Yesterday we read "Yoon and the Jade Bracelet."  It is about a girl who is tricked out of her new jade bracelet by an older girl at school.  My students were shocked and horrified and indignant.  Yoon was able to act wisely and get the bracelet back.  I thought it was a good moment for a life lesson, so I said, "If you were Yoon, what would you do the next day?"

All the hands shot up and I listened to everyone.  Some of them were vindictive and told me the revenge they would exact.  Some of them said they would leave the bracelet home.  One boy said, "I would be friends with the kids who stood up for me if I were Yoon."

Bingo.  I told him I agreed.

I loved seeing all their wheels turning as they were processing the story.  It feels electric when everyone is engaged like that.

Also, at school I think I have enough "what a day" experiences that it is just what a life.  It isn't a phase.

The school went from being extra cold, to extra hot.  And it has been humid (for here) the past few days.  At least before (like before the HVAC was replaced) when it was hot, at least air was moving.

Now it is just stagnant, hot, muggy air.

I don't know where they found the clowns that are working on our school, but I wonder if anyone kept the receipt so we can return them to their circus?

It is hard for all of us to maintain our equanimity.  My team and I collaborated in Matt's office after school, because the office is always a perfect temperature, which isn't great for morale....

Matt was at a meeting, but it was fun to be in his office because lots of people stopped by to ask him a question and stayed to chat.  Nicole (the assistant principal) came in and said, "This is fun," and sat down to visit.  A secretary came in to tell us a wacky tale.  

I told Miriam that she needed to be ready during parent teacher conferences because the parent of this particular student is a little creepy.  Alissa said the code word could be "papaya" and if I yelled, "papaya!" Miriam had to come running.  Nicole said to send her an invite to the conference and she would stay the whole time. (Strength in numbers!) Then she sent us all home about 15 minutes early, because it is hard to be happy in 80 degree stuffy rooms all day.

That place tries my patience regularly, but I am also ever grateful to work there.  I like those guys.

We had underground dress up day yesterday and we all wore crowns for no good reason.

Our students ask us questions all day anyway, so why not have one of the questions be, "But why are you wearing a crown?!?"

Yesterday, Braeden called.  He said that QE wondered, "What Nana was up to."  We chatted awhile and I talked to QE.  She excitedly told me about the night before when Papa FaceTimed her from Disneyland.  (He has been in Anaheim this week.) I asked her a little about her life and when they had to go, I heard her little voice say, "I love you Nana!"

How can I love one little person that much and her little brother that much too?  It staggers the mind.  But when she says, "I love you?"  It kills me.  More love than I can hold.

Besides that, I'm grateful Adam is home today and we have a weekend at home!

Baby steps

 There's a lot to manage in any one life.  I wouldn't say I have things managed, or even all that close to it.

I am trying to take my photographs in hand.  Iron out the nonsense.

I got a bunch of pictures from my mom and I have sorted them by date.  Then I needed to decide how to organize them.  I initially thought that I would digitize everything, including all my other pictures, and make Snapfish books because they don't take up as much space.  

Emma was aghast.  She said, "Are you out of space?" Well, no.  But I just want it all uniform and to make sense.

Emma said she wanted photos.

So I did the big photo sort.  I called her and said, "OK, you're going to be the one to deal with all of this someday...."  I have six photo albums that are more or less in good chronological order.  I don't want to disrupt that.  But I have these two photo albums.  Here is one:

Basically, it is pictures I found after I had completed the other albums and I didn't want to rearrange everything.

Then there's this gem:

The title of the photo album is trying to manage expectations, because it is a hot mess.  There is zero order to the photos.

Emma and I came up with the plan to have two chronologies going because I don't want to mess with the original six.  It's like the large plates and the small plates.

I am taking everything out of the chaotic albums.

I am going to write the date (approximately) and label who is in the pictures and put them in some semblance of order.  Happily the project has no due date.

Also, happily I get to look at all the pictures.

This picture of Adam (from when we lived in Connecticut) stopped me in my tracks because there is the World Trade Center.

This picture reminded me of that time I cut bones out of contact paper and stuck them to a black sweatsuit for Braeden for Halloween.  I remember it was such a pain!  (But look how cute those tiny, slightly blurry, kids are!)

So if you need me, I'll be staring at pictures, trying to discern when and who.... (I'm going to get Emma to help me on Sundays when she is over.)

Mothering

It isn't for the faint of heart.  I've known that since 1997.

As a teacher I interact with a lot of mothers.  Or try to.  I have a student whose mother is proving impossible for me to communicate with.  I've tried everything I can think of.  She doesn't speak English and I'm not sure her literacy level, so you can see the trouble.  Also, this same student's dad was deported recently so I really don't know their day to day.

I can only assume she is doing her best.  

I had a mother message me last week about the mistreatment of her student.  I could feel the frustration and sadness and anger in her message.  I felt a little trepidation about reaching out to the mother of the other student, because "your child has been mean" is not always well received.

The other mother rose to the occasion with flying colors.  She told me that she was sorry and her student would apologize and they would definitely follow up.

When parents choose to partner with teachers, it is a good thing and makes all the difference.

In some ways I think it is easier to mother adult children, while in other ways it is also way (way) harder.  You can't step in and take over.

Well, sometimes you can.

Mark has had a lot of trouble getting one of his several prescriptions filled.  It was out of stock, then they lost his prescription, then he had his doctor resubmit the prescription, then they said they were out of stock again.

I called the pharmacy during my lunchtime.

I brought all the mama bear energy I have honed over the last 29 years.  I was polite, but also not going to give up and I think we all realized that.

They told me they could get the prescription.  I said, "He's coming right now."  I called Mark and he soon texted me this.

 

I learned it from my own mom.  There comes a point when you just have to.

There are fewer and fewer times that I can/need to insert myself.

For those times, I'll stay ready.

Migraine, party of one

 Yesterday was day two of a headache that felt worse as time passed.  It was one of those days when I count the hours until I can lie down.  (In 12 hours I can lie down.  Now, in 11 1/2 hours I can lie down.)

Not great.  I mustered all my "It's this day, not me, that's bound to go away" energy.  I was going to make it.

Then, in the morning, one of the office ladies brought me a new student.  Zero warning.  A new student takes a lot of cheerfulness and pep.  I had neither, but I had a brand new student who looked terrified and it was up to me to make her feel welcome.  Happily, after my initial, "I'm Mrs. Davis and I am so glad you're here.  Here's a desk and hang your backpack there," one of my girls stepped in and gave her a friendship bracelet and said, "I can tell we're going to be friends!"

I love kids so much.

We got through the day with students helping to explain all the things to the new student and me white knuckling through it all.  Right before lunch, my headache was really awful.  I felt nauseous.  After taking my class to the lunchroom, I went in my classroom and turned off the lights and then the power went off.  I thought if we couldn't have school, it would be about the best thing to happen to me.

The power came back on before my students were back from lunch.  (There is still a lot of construction going on and I think that is why we lost power. ) 

The power went off later in the afternoon, but only for a few minutes.  

It really was that sort of a day.  

Kim and I walked after a long hiatus and I think that was helpful.  My headache felt more manageable as the evening continued.  I slept a lot last night and that was what I needed most.

So far no headache has killed me.

I like my odds.

Weekend

 I hustled home from school on Friday--leaving things undone--so we could head to Starr Valley.  We loaded the car and hit the road.

After the requisite Maverik stop, we listened to Sold a Story, which is a podcast about teaching reading and how educators got it so wrong for so long.

It is fascinating and I kept pausing it to pontificate.  I have feelings about teaching reading.

We had four little kittens bounding out to greet us when we got there.  Olivia has been feeding them there  and trying to get them acclimated to a new home.  We are thrilled to have them.  Adam is super allergic to cats and has never liked them.  He feels differently about those kittens.  (I think their potential as mousers has a lot to do with it, plus they are really cute.)

Adam talked very sweetly to them and I named them: Mattie, Ross, Little Blackie and Rooster.  I hope they live forever and have lots of babies and catch lots of mice.  Adam even took a picture of them (except illusive Little Blackie).  Who is this man?!?

from top: Rooster, Mattie and Ross

We made beds and wiped counters and waited and waited.  Our group was slow and had stopped at the Salt Flats for the experience.  I forget sometimes how wild the Salt Flats are if you haven't experienced them.  I am glad they got to enjoy.

I felt sorry that we were so late for dinner at Marianne and Robert's, but they were ever gracious. 

Marianne had made salads and Olivia had sliced up watermelon and Robert had built a fire.  We roasted hot dogs and s'mores and visited.  Our YW president, Molly, had connections to Orderville so she and Robert knew a lot of the same people.  The boys stayed with Marianne and Robert and the rest of us went back to our house.  All the girls spread out in the living room.  They had face masks (and put one on Adam, which delighted them) and were playing music and having a great time.  The adults all went to bed, which is my idea of a good time on a Friday night.

Saturday morning, Adam and I sneaked outside, trying not to wake anyone and took a little walkabout.  The kittens scampered after us.  We went to visit the horses and had to disabuse them of the idea that we had grain.  

Back at the house, people were starting to wake up.  We pulled out breakfast stuff and Robert brought the boys over.  My dad came over with his wagon and team of horses.  The kids were thrilled.  I climbed up on the seat next to my dad and a bunch of people piled in the back.  We went around the circle and it was a  good time.  We returned and traded the passengers.  My dad said, "We'll go the opposite way so the horses don't get dizzy."

One of the boys in the back said, "Wait, really?"

I said, "No.  He's joking."

After the wagon rides, Adam let anyone who wanted to have a turn driving his lawnmower.  It seemed a little like Tom Sawyer "letting" people help him paint the fence, but they didn't actually mow except one girl.

One of the leaders said to me, "Yesterday I felt like this was a long drive, but this has been so great!"

I was glad.  It is sort of a long drive, so I'm glad it felt worth it.

We got changed and before we loaded up and drove to Elko, Adam had asked me to share a little about my grandparents' house and them.

I told them the story about growing up around there and loving that spot.  I told them about the fire and my grandparents' reaction.  I said that I am sure they were sad, but to me, it just seemed like they got on with things.  I told them I was grateful for the opportunity to buy their house because I love that place so much.  I want to continue the legacy and create a place for my grandchildren to love.

More than that, I want to follow their legacy of faith.  Because of their focus on serving and living the Gospel of Jesus Christ, they knew that a house was just a house.  They taught me to rebuild rather than wallow.  They taught me that focusing on things that matter most helps you survive a world of ups and downs with equanimity.  With that, we drove to Elko.

Olivia had arranged everything and they were ready for us.  Everyone was very kind, just like you expect.  When I was growing up, if I was trying to establish who I was around there, I would start with, "My grandpa is Harvey Dahl," and people would say, "Ohhhh," and immediately know who I was.

Now I tell them that I am Marianne and Olivia's sister.  When I told the ladies handing out clothes that, they nodded knowingly and told me they loved my sisters.

A member of the temple presidency came up to me and shook my hand and said, "You look familiar, you must be Marianne's and Olivia's sister."

Happily, yes.

The youth performed their baptisms and it was a good experience for everyone.  I love being in the temple and I love those good kids who love being in the temple.

Adam and I went to Little Caesar's and got the pizza Olivia had ordered (it's not what you know, it's who you know).  We met everyone at a park.  The young women lovingly mothered and/or hounded one of the younger boys.  Molly's daughter said, "My mom will give you ten dollars if you can hit the crow in that tree with a piece of pizza crust."

Molly said, "Hey, I didn't say that, and he plays baseball.  Don't make deals like that."

The boy squarely hit the bird in the tree.  The crow barely registered the indignity, ruffling its feathers a little and stayed on its branch.

Then they encouraged the same boy to lie on the grass with a piece of pizza on his chest to see if the birds would come and eat it.

They were funny kids and I enjoyed being around them.

They headed back to Utah and Adam and I went back to Starr Valley.  Even though we hated to, because it feels early, we winterized.  Adam will be traveling a lot (big surprise) and we wanted to get it done while we could.

We drove home, finished our podcast and I was happy to see my bed.

Marianne had the idea to meet as siblings with my dad every month, so Ammon set up a google meet and I was happy to meet with them on Sunday afternoon.  Adam had an ALL DAY Sunday.  He left early and got home around 6:30 pm.  He happily walked in right when I was FaceTiming our grandchildren so he got to see their cute faces.  Always a lift for the spirits.

We took a walk and the sunset was beautiful.

Mark took Adam to the airport in the predawn and I'm about ready to head to school.

The beat goes on.

Grateful Friday

 In college, no one told me that a big chunk of being a teacher would be meetings.  So many meetings.  Also, taping books.  At least 2-3 books make their way to my desk every day.  They get ripped and they need me to repair them. 

They also didn't cover some of the most delightful things either.

Like the children.

They are cute and tiny and come to school with enormous backpacks (that some of them call pack packs).  They give me a big smile in the morning and randomly hug me throughout the day.  Fourth graders sneak in my room at the end of our lunch recess.  They think they are hilarious and Big Kids since last year's fourth graders tried to do the same thing.

I love when they earnestly put their heads together to try to solve a math problem.

I love when they give me a look and say, "I don't get it."

I like that so much more than just quietly hoping I won't notice they don't get it.

In phonics we were learning about short vowel multisyllabic words.  They don't know the definition of some of the words so we discuss.  One word was shamrock.  I asked if they knew what a shamrock was.

One boy raised his hand and said, "It's the milkshakes you get at McDonald's to celebrate Pioneer Day."

Almost.

Another word was tropics.  That was a real puzzler.  No one had an idea.  Finally a girl ventured a guess that it was fruit, like watermelon.

Someone said, "Maybe it's like the Troppo Tourists in Nim's Island."  (I am reading Nim's Island to them, and yes, probably Troppo is a riff on tropical.)

I pulled out the globe and we had a whole demonstration of the equator and I showed them the tropics and I had a boy stand in the middle of the room and said he was the sun and I revolved the globe around him so they could see that the equator is always closest.  We made guesses about where Nim's island was located.

In the afternoon we read a story about Jacob Davis (no, he isn't related to me although my students were 100% convinced he was) creating the first blue jeans.  He invented rivets on pants.  In the story he bought fabric for the pants from Levi Strauss in San Francisco.  When he couldn't afford a patent, he teamed up with Levi Strauss to help pay for the patent and they worked together.

We investigated two boys' jeans who had rivets.  One boy's were Levis.  You can imagine the thrill.  I was wearing a Levi denim jacket and they studied me for rivets.  

Then an entire discussion involving patent law ensued.  They were fascinated and had so many questions! 

Turns out I don't know a lot about patent law, so I googled it.  I learned patents only last 20 years. I had no idea. 

I probably write this every Friday, but I'm grateful to be a teacher.  I love being there and learning along with them.

After school today we are going back to Starr Valley.  Some young men and young women from our ward are making the trip and we are going to go to the Elko temple tomorrow.  Because there aren't many temples around here....

I am grateful for my family enhancing the experience and making it work.

Marianne and Robert are hosting dinner for us tonight and the boys are staying at their house.  My dad is going to come over tomorrow morning before we go to Elko and give buggy rides.  Olivia got the temple appointments all arranged.

I am grateful for my village.  They are a good little village.

Leaning towards autumn

 We took a short walk before dinner last night.  We talked about something we were looking forward to.  Adam and Mark said they were looking forward to watching the Seahawks game.  I said I was looking forward to not watching the Seahawks game.

No shade on the Seahawks, I just had stuff I wanted to do.

I watched the opening with them.  I'm neither from Seattle nor a big Seahawks fan, but I saw the love letter they were writing to Seattle and to Seahawks fans.

They celebrated their Super Bowl win with Kam Chancellor as emcee.  Nirvana was playing when the team ran out.  They had a guitarist from Pearl Jam play the national anthem.  Richard Sherman raised the 12 flag and hyped up the crowd.

Mark said, "Ladies, get you a man that loves you like Richard Sherman loves a crowd."

I said, "Ladies, get you a man that loves like a loyal Mariners fan."

It's easy to be a Seahawks fan.  They win.

I love that Adam and our boys doggedly root for the Mariners.

Fighter jets flew over Lumen Field and I left the boys with their chicken wings and veggie tray and went upstairs to do my stuff.

I liked all the spectacle.

And I liked some quiet time.

One of the things I wanted to do was put away the summer pillows in favor of the autumn pillows.  I used to be all in for seasonal decorating.  Now I mostly just shift the pillows and a few things.  I want it to feel like the season we are in, but I don't want it to feel like Hobby Lobby.

When I went downstairs for pillows, there was a commercial, so I enlisted Adam and Mark to carry stuff up and down the stairs.  

I boxed up the summer pillows and Adam went to take them downstairs.  He asked, "Where do they go?"

I said, "Mark knows."

Ladies, get you a son who knows where the seasonal throw pillows go.

Tiny notes

 Dear Protein Energy Drink Sellers,

I see what you're doing by gifting us with cases and cases of your products.  Teacher = caffeine and protein to boot.  You want to get us all hooked.  I am sorry to say a soda can with that much caffeine that contains milk (whey powder, but still it kind of freaks me out), does not appeal to me.  

Dear Students,

I love you, but at 2:15, you need to go home.

Dear Students, 

I love you, but stop tapping on my window before the bell rings when I'm trying to get everything ready.

Dear Parents,

When you spell your child's name some cutesy but still phonetic way, we roll our eyes a little (looking at you parents of Westly or Bearett).  When you opt for a not even phonetic way (Harliee), we are judging you.  So hard.  

Dear The Home Place,

You never disappoint me.

Dear Going out of Town Two Weekends in a Row,

What am I going to do with you?  I have lots of home things I want to do, but I also like the weekends away.  I guess carry on.

Dear Sub-contractor who is responsible for our rooms being in the low 60s all day,

What is your actual problem?

Dear Growth Mindset,

Thanks for pulling us through.  We started brand new WIN groups and small groups yesterday and it was a hot mess.  After school, we mustered all our courage and said, "We just don't have it figured out...yet."  All that preaching about you to students helped us.

Dear Olivia,

Thank you for introducing cats into the habitat surrounding our house.  Let's hope they love mice.

Labor Day

 The reunion is in the books.  It was a wonderful time.  I'm exhausted + it was worth it.

Yesterday morning, we hosted everyone for breakfast.  I loved having everyone crammed into our little house.  In retrospect, maybe we should have borrowed another table from the neighbors, but it worked out.  Desi's baby sat in the same high chair my mom, all of us, and our children have sat in.  A four generation chair.  It was my grandma's and it is solid.  I think it will probably last another generation.

I love these adoring and capable parents.  Quality.

We have been scheming about lighting in our house.  I keep buying more lamps on a wing and a prayer and the real trouble is overhead lights.  I talked with Ammon and my dad about it.  Ammon started measuring and my dad started brainstorming ideas.  Everything he said, I would say, "But how?!?" and he would look at me a little pityingly because he can do anything.  We have the start of a good idea and it involves my dad welding us a bespoke creation.  It is a little unconventional, which I love.  My house never looks like a showroom and that is the way I like it.  

Once we had breakfast sorted, we went to the cemetery.  My dad took a group on his buggy--or is it a wagon?  I don't know.  It is bigger than his buggy, so I don't know what we call it.  Another group of us walked (it's about 1 1/2 miles from our house) and some drove.  It was a perfect day.  Sunny, but not hot.  While we were walking, Olivia helped us arrange our youth baptism trip to the Elko temple next weekend.  Adam hadn't been able to get reservations in his desired time and Olivia called the temple president and got us set up.

It's not what you know, it's who you know.

Adam, Josh, Olivia, Lili, Omar, Ammon, Marcos, Azure, Lucette, Ruben, Clarissa, Ammon, Robert, Olivia, Me, Marianne, our dad, Desi and Isaiah.  (Mason was heroically taking the picture.)

The cemetery feels like sacred ground.  We all just stood there and cried a little.  Then we had a song and a prayer and started sharing memories of my mom.  How we miss her!

Olivia and I climbed up on the seat to ride back with my dad.  Marianne took a picture of Lili and Alazon (the horse) and we successfully photobombed.

I love being up on the seat with my dad.  

Ammon fed us lunch (at our house) and it was a crowded, convivial time.  After we all said our good-byes and everyone left, Adam and I finished tidying up and I felt sad to leave.  I loved how alive and warm and happy our house was with so many people I love.  

But, there's the matter of our jobs....

Weekend

 I put our flag out when we are here.  (I fancy myself to be the monarchy and we are in residence....)

This is how I know Emma is here.  I love waking up to this leaning against the wall, even though I sadly went to bed while she was pulling it out to play.

On Saturday morning Adam and I took a walk with Marianne, Robert, Clarissa, Desi, Mason and Louisa.  It is decidedly cooler than last time we were here and I doubled up with sweatshirts for the walk.  Still lovely though.  I love the crunch of gravel when you walk.  The best kind of walk.

Back at our house, Emma played some of her music for me and I cried.  Then Adam made me laugh so much I cried.  Then I washed off my mascara and tried again with waterproof mascara.

We went to Elko and my dad treated us all to lunch at The Star. (photo credits Marianne)

My dad, Tabor, Olivia, Edgar, Josh, Lili, Hyrum, Isaiah, Mason
Ammon, me and Adam

Desi, Clarissa, Emma, Mark
My dad, Tabor, Olivia, Edgar, Josh, Lili, Hyrum, Isaiah, Mason

The cool kids table: Ammon, Ruby, Marcos and Charlotte.  (Some of the cool kids were elsewhere at the time of the photo...)

We were talking about routines and whether we were routine people or not.  My dad said he is a minimalist and likes a routine.  Olivia said, "He only spends about $14 dollars a week on food!"

Eying the bill for all of our lunches, which was basically a scroll, I said, "Not this week!"

It was very kind of him.

From there we went to the temple.  Aunt Olivia was there and I got to chat briefly and give her a hug.  It was nice to be in the temple together.  It feels like heaven.  And it feels like my mom.

As Ammon said, "Tabor was really counting on the concept that if the camera can see you, you can see the camera."  Pictures are hard and I think we did pretty well with a selfie for that many! (Kudos to Ammon with the long arm.)

We had dinner that night at Marianne's provided by Tabor's family.  Katie was sick unfortunately, so she didn't come, but Tabor and his girls made us a great dinner.

After we ate, each family shared a family history story and several people performed talents.  I enjoyed it.  We have some musically talented kids!  (If I do say so myself.) I think they have for sure outpaced their parents for talent.  Emma and Mark went back to Utah after all of that.

Sunday we went to church and in Sunday School, when they wanted visitors to introduce themselves, my dad stood up and pointed to all of us and said our names.  I enjoyed church.  It is always good to be back in the Wells Ward.

We ate lunch at Olivia's.  

We ate in the gazebo and called it First Class

Here was economy class:

We wrote letters to our missionaries and assembled hygiene kits.  My dad gave us a Come Follow Me lesson.  

Tabor and Ruby and Charlotte left after that.  Family members kept having to peel off, but it hasn't spoiled our good time.

We ate dinner last night at Marianne's.  

Josh, Lucette, Olivia, Clarissa, Ammon, me and Mason

After dinner we visited a little, then started an escape room game.  People either immediately or gradually lost interest.  

I put in a small effort, but I was tired so we left shortly after 8:00.

Here is the small, but mighty, group at 10:00, when they finally escaped.

Omar, Marianne, Josh, Mason and Olivia

This morning I did my favorite thing, I got up when it was just getting light, I lit some candles and I am tucked under a blanket in my chair.  

I will have to move eventually, because everyone is coming here for breakfast.

For right now, this is really nice.

Grateful Friday

 A day late.  I forgot to hit publish yesterday....

 I am grateful Adam was home all week long!  Unusual and welcome.

I am grateful to be a teacher.  Yesterday one of my students told me, "You are funnier than my dad and my dad is hilarious."

(I don't think I am actually that funny, but I slay with eight-year-olds.)

I am grateful for my new class job, which is Siri.  Where has this been all my life?!?  One of them is Siri for the week.  When a student asks, "What do I do when I'm finished?" or "What are we doing?" or "What do I do now?" or another similarly maddening question like that when I have told them a million times, I refer them to Siri.

They ask the student who is Siri instead of me.  (And the student who is Siri pays good attention so they can answer the inane questions.) 

I am grateful for my friends at school.  I like everyone so much.  I am really and truly an introvert (I eat lunch alone in my classroom with the lights off if that tells you anything), but I really and truly love having friends.

I am grateful for a three day weekend and a family reunion.  We are going to Nevada and we have a weekend of food, folks and fun planned.  (Remember that McDonald's commercial?)  I am looking forward to seeing everyone and visiting and enjoying time together.  I am looking forward to the drive--love a road trip.

Some of my best friends are going through hard times.  They have ailing spouses or ailing selves or ailing parents.  I have friends who have suffered loss.  I pray for them and feel a little sad because I can't fix anything for them.  Me fixing anything isn't the point and I guess I am learning that.

I am grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ and I am thankful for Him.  He is a fixer!  I am also thankful that I can pray.  I know through experience that it matters when people are praying for you.  You look back and think, "How did I do that?" and you know that a lot of prayers helped.

Yesterday, Maren stopped by the school and we were all so happy to see her!  She stopped me and asked, "How are you?"  I gave her a rundown and I thanked her for everything she did for me last fall.  She stepped in many times and taught my class when I was having a procedure.

We aren't left alone.

Humming along

 I dreamt all night about teaching math.  As good as my class is this year at reading, it is not the same story with math!  I had tried several versions of a three digit with regrouping addition quiz with lots of reteaching and practice in between and I could not get to mastery with my students.

Also, in my dream, I knew that there was a magical way to teach math, but it was just out of my reach.

All night long.

Yesterday I tried again and they finally got it!  

Yipee!

I am also happy that every day, we are sliding more and more into a routine.  They are understanding my systems and things are humming.

After school we had a faculty meeting and we are starting collective efficacy groups.  We were assigned and as I sat with my group, I was pleased with who I was assigned to.  Lacey sat down and said, "This is a good group."

Emily sat down and said, "I am happy to see the faces in this group."

So we have that going for us.

(Oaklee said she hates fighting and I promised her we wouldn't fight.) 

Before we met with our groups, we had a very intense discussion about boundary changes and school closures.

At the end of the discussion, Matt said, "Are there any more questions?"

I said, "This seems kind of anticlimactic after school closures, but I have a question about RIDER tickets.  (Our school-wide behavior system.)

Every teacher has been asking each other about it and I said I would ask at the meeting.  

I am one of the oldest teachers so I am motherly towards them and also not afraid to raise my hand and ask a question.

We got our answer and my group talked about our collective efficacy.  I made it back into my classroom with enough time to get handwriting sorted and to have our IT guy come and fix a broken computer. 

After dinner, I went with Adam to a park for disc golf with the youth.  If you think I played disc golf, have we met?  But I walked around and chatted and it was a beautiful evening.

Adam and I both thought the park reminded us of "spaceship park" in Connecticut (named by preschooler, Braeden).  It is in American Fork, but the tall trees block the mountains and that rarely happens around here.  Usually, the mountains are the backdrop, full stop.

I love living in a beautiful place and I love this less surface of the sun, but still nice and warm time of year.

This is all to say, it was a good day.

Compare and contrast

 Since I have a one line a day journal, I know that last year on this day, I was still waiting to get my PET scan and surgery scheduled.  I was a mess emotionally and I didn't feel well.

Things are, gratefully, so different this year health wise.  I am not cured, but I am better and don't have anything scary hanging over me.

Last year, I mostly sat on the Buddy Bench during recess duty because I was so tired.  Now I walk around and chat and break up fights and tell them to stay away from the bees.

My class is different too.  Last year was a refiner's fire I guess because it was the school year of not fun things.

Last year, when I was walking my class down the hall, it seemed like the loud circus was in town.  This year, my class follows me down the hall like a little silent row of ducklings.  They are just...civilized.  

Last year my kiva was constantly getting knocked around and I was constantly adjusting it.  This year it just stays in its spot.

Last year, when I would ask the specialty teachers how my class had behaved, they would give me an exasperated, "Not well."  This year, they say things like, "Excellent!" and "They were great!"

Last year, I had a student who was nonverbal, a student who spoke no English, several boys who were wild and raucous.  I had major behavior problems.  I had lots of kids who couldn't read much of anything.

Yesterday, I had them read their story aloud and I went around and listened in.  They were all just dutifully sitting there...and reading.

I don't even know what to think about that.  

Last year we had wild temperature swings.  Sometimes it was so hot and miserable.  Now it is cold.  Still miserable, but different.

Eventually, hopefully, they will get it fixed and I think I will be sitting pretty.

I take it back

 For years we've been saying at school that we would rather have our rooms too cold than too hot.  We've been saying you can always put on a layer.

OK.

I was freezing yesterday.  

My classroom was 62 degrees when I got there in the morning and warmed all the way up to 67 by the end of the day.  That doesn't sound too terrible, except I wore sandals! (It was in the 80s outside and I had recess duty.)

I had a cardigan, but I was cold.

Our AC is fixed and (obviously) working really well.

What isn't working is the regulator.  It is just on.  And cold.

Guess who is wearing socks and shoes and taking a jacket today?  

Weekend

 For the second Friday in a row, I got sleep.  I went to bed fully at 8:00 which was my bedtime in elementary school and slept 10 1/2 hours.

Glorious.

Also glorious: some rainy weather.  I took a few pictures of the sky on Saturday.

We met up with Emma at Deseret Book in American Fork, because I had offered to buy her new temple clothes.  Her car was broken into last summer and her temple bag was stolen.  We interacted with two different ladies at Deseret Book and it was a wild time.  One of the ladies was super excited because she thought Emma was a new temple patron.  We let her down gently that her clothes had just been stolen.  Then the woman was horrified.  She was practically reeling from the atrocity.  She finally asked Emma where she had been when it had happened and Emma said, "I live in Salt Lake City.  It happened there."

This woman said, "Oh!  That's good!"

(In other words, Utah County = still safe.)

The other woman reminded me of Lady Bracknell in The Importance of Being Earnest.  At one point, Lady Bracknell says, "To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness."

This second woman looked at Emma and asked, "How were your clothes stolen?!?"

The ladies at Deseret Book are always a little scary.  First they greet you with such energy and then you seem to disappoint them every item you don't buy.

We went to lunch to celebrate making it out of Deseret Book.

I had Adam help me hang this picture:

This frame had been in my grandma's house.  She had pictures of "her missionaries" in it, grandchildren on missions (and one of my parents when they were in Nauvoo).  Since there were eight holes for pictures, I bought these maps of the eight places where we have lived. (We don't exactly live in Starr Valley, but sometimes.)

The frame is really heavy and of high quality, because it was my grandma's.  I usually find the cheapest frame I can find.  Here's hoping it stays afloat.

We had a nice Sunday.  Church and family history--part of the time I was preparing for our family reunion where we are each presenting about an ancestor.

Emma came over and we had dinner and Come Follow Me and took a walk.  She sang us part of a new song she is writing and Mark played a song for her that he had listened to recently.  We played a few hands of golf.

Sundays are good.

Today it is back at it.  Adam is home all week!  I am looking forward to that.

Grateful Friday

 Yesterday I was driving to work and got a phone call from Whitney.  She said, "No one died."

I didn't know how to respond to that.

She said, "I know it's early for you, so I don't want you to think anything is wrong because I am calling so early."

Then she explained that she was at Costco (in Atlanta, where she lives) and they had Esprit sweatshirts.  Did I want one?  Because she would buy me one and ship it to me. (She was there to witness the angst of me not being able to get one when we were in Washington in July.)

It was just the nicest thing and I said, "Absolutely!"

I am grateful for people that think of me and act on their kind impulses.

I am grateful for the torrential rain we had yesterday afternoon.  Monsoon season is a good time.  And we need it!

I am grateful Adam is home.  I wish he was home all the time, but at this point, I will take what I can get.

I had a student gift me with a book she had written (about her hamster).  A boy said he wanted to write a book too, but he didn't have any paper at home.  I gave him paper.  He wanted to do it at school and I told him that he could, when his work was done.  He kept doing everything except his work.  

Then he would cry when we would transition to something else and he didn't have time to work on his book.

Finally at the end of the day, there was a block of time that he was finished with his work and I told him he could write his book.  He had me staple it to his specifications.  I had to hear all about his pencil sharpener.  (I can't tell you how much I have heard about his pencil sharpener over the last week.  A loooooot.)  He finally got situated and said, "Hmmm.  It's actually hard to write a book."

He wrote about three words before time to clean up for the day.  I coaxed him to take his "book" home to work on.

Despite the sort of maddening characteristics of these people, I really love third graders.  I am grateful I get to be with them.

Speaking of third grade.  We had our first fire drill of the year yesterday.  One little girl is terrified of fire alarms.  Terrified!  She was in the special ed. room at the time, but the teacher told me she started crying and shaking and yelling, "I need Jesus!"

Same.

We all do and I'm grateful for the reminder.

And that's how wacky Wednesday began

 Yesterday my document camera was displaying my screen like a keystone.  It's a problem that I kind of know how to fix and kind of don't know how to fix.  I got one side going straight, but I couldn't get the other one straight.  Miriam suggested resetting the whole thing.

Then it was upside down.

(The bell is there because every day, one of the class jobs is to pick a picture to draw by their name.  It weirdly helps them to remember to put their name on the paper.  The student picked a bell and some of them didn't know how to draw a bell, so I put a bell on the board.  Like you do.)

During my lunchtime I plied Google for answers about my document camera and everything was for document cameras that are much newer than mine.  

I finally went to find Riley.  Staying in the custodian's good graces is the best advice I could ever give a teacher. 

He said, "Oh, yeah, that's an easy fix."

But then he struggled a bit to read upside down and I can read upside down easily--a skill honed by helping students at my desk.  Between the two of us, we figured it out.

Before I rest on my laurels too much, here is another thing to attend to....

Highs and lows

The lows:

I woke up feeling anxious.  No reason.  

I came home with a sore throat.  Too much talking.

I went to Walmart on the way home from school and I don't know if there is a worse time to go to Walmart (so busy) or a worse mood to take to Walmart (stick a fork in me and I am done after school).

Mark is sick.  We don't know if he was glutened or what.  He doesn't feel like eating and his blood sugar has been all over the map.  It is wearying to helplessly witness his health struggles.

Dolly Parton passed away.  I don't know if I have ever felt more sad at the passing of someone who 1) I didn't know or 2) isn't a church leader I have loved listening to for years.  I broke the news to my team while we were meeting, because Mark had texted the news.  They were stunned and sad as well.  What a legend!

I had two new students yesterday and I struggled to catch them up while I'm still trying to move everyone along as well.  I had them water color painting their self portraits at my desk while everyone else was doing other stuff and everyone needed me at the same time.  One of the painters spilled his entire cup of water on my desk and guess who is out of paper towels?  (I have put in a custodial request, but here we are.)

The highs:

Kim is back from her vacation and we are going to resume walking today.  I need it!

Every day, no matter what the day throws at me, I have a safe comfortable place to come home to.

Adam isn't halfway around the world, just across the country--makes talking easier.

Megan (the ILC coach) helped me get my students logged into their computers for the first time.

Fuji Apple Clear soda from Walmart is almost worth going to Walmart.  So good!

We had a very productive team meeting yesterday.  It was long and we were scattered all over the place, but at the end, we reached some actual clarity about things that had been percolating in our brains.  Alissa said, "Good sesh."

She wasn't wrong.

Finally, it turns out you can find something on Amazon to help you display the silver mounted bits your dad made you.

These are the days

 These are the days of paying the piper at home because last week I just collapsed in a crumpled heap after school each day and I have some tidying to do!

These are the days of our boys texting back and forth in our family group chat about who will inherit what.  (I think it's spurred on--pardon the pun--by the silver my dad gifted us with.)  It's funny to me that the business major knows exactly how to divide things advantageously for him, the PhD jokingly said Emma could keep the stuff and he would keep his "sense of superiority."

As for Emma, she was at work and didn't chime in.

None of it surprised me, is what I'm saying.

These are the days of starting actual curriculum at school.  I forgot how to access the phonics slides and I was answering so many email before school, I didn't have a chance to practice.  Jamie came in serendipitously and saved my bacon.

These are the days of Adam leaving again.  He flew to the East coast and then in a few days he will go to Nashville.  So in the span of a week, he will have been in Greenwich time, Pacific, Mountain, Central and Eastern.  On the way to the airport, he called me and said, "I am tired."

Shocker.

These are the days of absolutely baking on the blacktop during afternoon recess duty.

These are the days of looking longingly at the mountains for the first signs of autumn, my favorite season!

These are the days of my team and me walking into each others' classrooms and asking, "What are you doing for this?"  "Did we talk about that?"

We share a brain.  It's a good brain (collectively).

These are the days of Mark and I getting home about the same time.  "How was class?"  "How was school?"  "Dinner at 6:00?"  "Yep."  Then we went our separate ways like the introverts who haunt this place when Adam is away.

These are pretty good days.

Weekend

 You've had a birthday, shout hurray!

We celebrated my dad and it was a good time.  It was also a good time that Adam got home Friday.  We were both too tired to think about dinner so we had bread and cheese and fruit which is one of my top five dinners.  Also, chocolate lava cake from Marks and Spencers.  I slept 11 hours that night.  I never knew I had the capacity for that much sleep prior to cancer!

On Saturday we headed to Starr Valley.  We stopped quickly at our house and there were two mouse in traps (so horrible and I am not even the one that empties the traps, although I was the one to clean the floor--horrible).  We made our salad and went to Marianne's.

All my dad's siblings had come and it was nice to see everyone.

Demar, Lora (his wife), my dad, Drew, Claudia, Olivia, Brad (her husband), Jennifer, Joe and Jeannette (his wife)

I love how much they all love each other.  They had kind of a wild childhood with plenty of independent adventures, but Grandpa and Grandma also raised them to be a close-knit band.  It is aspirational.

Olivia made my dad banana cream pie.

After we ate, everyone shared a memory of my dad.  My favorite part was my aunts and uncles disparaging each other's memories and saying, "That's not how it happened," and "Who's telling this story anyway?!?" and "You have a very creative memory."

They were good stories all the same, whether or not they were disputed.

The aunts and uncles all went to Aunt Olivia's and my dad stayed to visit with us a little.  We gave him the gift from Marianne and Olivia and me.  It was Marianne's idea to create a book containing all the blogposts my mom had written from their mission to Nauvoo.  My dad cried when he opened it (and so did the rest of us).  It was more a gift from our mom than us, because she had written it.

Before Ammon went back to Utah, we posed for a picture (Enoch and Tabor weren't able to come and they and their families were missed).  Olivia and I did this with our hands to make my dad laugh and it worked.

Making him laugh has always been a dopamine hit.

Our dad went to go spend the rest of the evening with his siblings and Marianne and Robert came over to our house for frozen pizza.  Olivia was invited too, but didn't see the text early enough.  She came over to visit and I love being in their neighborhood.

Sunday morning Adam and I decided to take a walk.  I was expecting a gentle walk along the fragrant willows, but we decided to go up and see the top of our property line.  It is a nice view.

I used to play there as a kid, but Adam hadn't been all the way up.  My dad called just when we were reaching the top and I said, "If I sound winded, it is because I am winded!"  It is steep.  He said he had two bits to give us.  He made two bits for each of his children.

He wrote up a description for each of us, "for when you sell them at an auction."

I said, "You know none of us are going to ever sell them."

He said our grandchildren might.

I hope they never get that hungry.

I need to figure out how to display them.  I'm pretty sure Amazon doesn't have a-bit-stand-in-case-your-dad-made-you-two-silver-mounted-bits....

We went to church and happily, Edgar was the high council visitor and Olivia and Ruben were speaking with him.  Marianne led the choir and it was a big choir and I was related to everyone except 4 of them.  I whispered that to my dad and he said, "I am too."  It was a great meeting that I was grateful to attend and then we drove home.  I had to stop singing on the way home because my throat started hurting.  Any trip with Emma and Mark is going to involve music.  And we started the trip by singing hymns that are based on Psalms.  There are a lot of them!

I am grateful to be home and looking forward to another week of school. 

Grateful Friday

 Yesterday my students worked on their self portraits.  It's a good first week activity to practice listening and following directions and routines.  I told them they could use colored pencils or crayons, no markers.  (Markers get a little crazy + I have skin toned colored pencils and crayons.)

One boy really wanted to use markers and he kept asking and I kept saying no.

When it was time to make their name tag that will accompany their portrait on the wall, I showed them a few variations of how they could make their name.  Then, I said, "But you can do it any way you want."

Of course, a few of them had follow up questions.  "Can I do rainbow colors?"

I said, "Yes, you can do whatever colors you want."

"Can I do two colors?"

"Yes.  Whatever you want."

More questions and I finally said, "Follow your heart."

The boy who wanted markers came up to me and said, "My heart really wants to use markers."

I told him too bad, not on this project.

We read the story Elmer.  It is about an elephant who is patchwork instead of gray and feels like he is a misfit, but then he realizes he is funny and all the animals love him.

To practice brainstorming, we gathered ideas about what made them unique.  I started by showing them how I can write backwards.  (Always a crowd pleaser for 8 year olds!)

At the end, I took a picture because I was so delighted by their ideas:

I am a lot less delighted by this marker I am using that is staining my board pink.... I will remedy that eventually.

All that aside, I am feeling grateful.  I am enjoying this class.  I love being a teacher.  I am grateful to feel healthy.  I am grateful for Mark being my buddy and helper and all the things.  I am grateful Adam is coming home today (!) and I'm grateful we are going to Nevada this weekend.

Both our dads have the same birthday, August 22.  I am grateful for both of them!