Grateful Friday

 I freaked out last night and I'm grateful that Mark talked me down and then Adam talked me down some more.  

I need them in my life.

School is a lot.  Everything is a lot.  Everything is too much.

I had activity days waiting for me in my driveway when I came hurtling home from school and then I found out that they are resurfacing the roads in our neighborhood so we aren't going to be able to drive on them today or Monday.  No...big deal....

We are going to Nevada after school today, but we can't drive on our road....

Mark stepped in with problem solving when I had nothing.  Mark parked his car out of the neighborhood and he's going to ride his bike to it later when he is going to his friend's wedding.  Adam is taking EVERYTHING including the cooler to work with him, then he will come back and meet me and I'm leaving Joan somewhere.

It's pretty terrible timing, but I think we'll make it work.

I have other things to be grateful for besides Mark to talk me down.

I'm grateful Adam is home from another trip.

I'm grateful for the friendly "Good Morning Miz Davis!" tiny children call to me in the hall every morning at school.  It is especially delightful when they aren't my students, but they're my people.  I love that they are in my life and I am in theirs.

I'm grateful for the random urgent questions I am asked.  During recess yesterday a boy zoomed up to me and said, "The moon is bigger than Earth, right?"

I said "No, Earth is bigger."

He said, "OK," and zoomed away.

I am grateful for how pleasant recess and traffic duty are in May.

We had a Wicked themed teacher appreciation week.  Yesterday the third grade was called in to meet the wizard.  Everyone had to stand before the wizard and get a small gift and some compliments.

I was told that I was as spunky as my red shoes.  I do love my red shoes and I am glad they got a mention.

I asked my team if "spunky" was code for cranky about the construction.  They said they didn't think it was code for anything

I don't know.

Alissa said, "What did they say about me?  I think I blacked out because I don't like that much attention."

I told her they said she was a joy to watch teach and it was clear she loved her students and they loved her.

She said, "Well that's nice."

I am grateful to have a team.  If for no other reason we can reassure each other and listen to and then relay compliments for each other.

I am grateful for my sweet, sweet students.  They are sweeter than I deserve because construction noise makes me grumpy.

One of my students made me a collection of paper flowers.

Another used a 3D printer in art and made me this:

A very quiet and sweet boy solemnly asked me if it was teacher appreciation week.

I said yes.

He said, "OK then."

He pulled this out of his backpack and handed it to me.  A brown paper bag made into an envelope using electrical tape.

I felt like crying when I saw the contents.

They are better than I deserve.

Speaking of better than I deserve, this Mother's Day weekend I'm grateful for my mother and Adam's mother and my friends and sisters who are all stellar examples of motherhood to me.

I'm grateful that I get to be a mother.  It is a blessing in my life.

I'm grateful that we're going to Nevada this weekend and we'll get to see both mothers on Mother's Day and spend lots of good family time.

Fair warning

 Yesterday there was really loud construction again.  I thought the demolition was done!  But, they had to knock out a bunch of brick to widen the entry to make it ADA compliant.

It was awful.

At lunch there was a lull in the sound.  I was walking down the hall and saw the main construction guy.  I asked him if they were done with the bulk of the noise.  He said, "Huh?" and moved his headphones so I asked him again.

He said, "It's still going to be loud."

He couldn't say he didn't warn me.

Miriam and I hid out in the extra 5th grade classroom, then the third grade practiced for the dance festival until recess.

After recess it was finally quiet.

But after school, Matt told us that they didn't make the opening wide enough.

***

My students were doing an assessment, expanding simple sentences.

One of them just recopied the simple sentences.

Yes, because that was what I meant.

Several of them had a grouchy teacher (me) return their papers because they didn't capitalize the sentences.  How many times do I need to tell them?!?

(Very, very many.)

One student was turning in her paper and she is the sweetest hard-working dyslexic little girl who can't spell a bit.  She gave me a rueful look and said, "Just so you know, some of these words are not spelled correctly."

I appreciated the heads up, since I never would have realized on my own they were misspelled....

*** 

I went on a walk with Kim and before I left I told Mark that when I got home to remind me to switch the laundry and then we were going to drop off some things for my ministering sisters and then we were going to MOD for dinner.

He said, "You're honestly asking me to remind you of something?"

Fair point, ADHD kid.

***

In honor of Teacher Appreciation Week, MOD had buy one get one free pizza.  I told Mark that the woman in front of us in line was a teacher.  "I guarantee it," I said.  "That lady over there is too.  And her."

I watched one of them get out her email to check on the teacher BOGO.  "See," I told Mark.

Another suspected teacher hugged another one and then introduced her to her son as, "My first practicum student."

Teachers.

Another one joined her husband and I thought she looked like a teacher.  She set her Alpine School District ID on the table.

Yep.

When I was ordering my pizza, the girl working there asked, "So is this for the Teacher Appreciation Week BOGO?"

I guess I obviously look like a teacher too?

Then I realized I was wearing my Bonneville Elementary shirt.

Impulse buy

 A few years ago, Miriam bought a kiva for her classroom from a teacher who was retiring.

She had it a year or two and I was jealous of it.

Then she put it for sale on Facebook marketplace because it was too bulky in her classroom.  Michelle, the school counselor, bought it.

Yesterday my class was in the counselor room, having a lesson, and I saw an email that Michelle was selling the kiva.

I bought it. (This picture is in the counselor room.  I dearly wish I had a disco ball!)

A bit bigger than a pack of gum impulse buy at say a gas station.

I may regret it.  It is big and will take up a lot of precious real estate.

On the other hand, it will be great for class discussions as well as all of the storage underneath it.

Also, Michelle is my next door neighbor so it won't be hard to move! (I showed Mark this picture last night so he would know what was in his future.)

Balancing

 It's all so much!

I have a lot to do at school and a lot to do at home.  

At home we have a few busy weeks/weekends coming up, plus an extra person in our household.  There's stuff to do.

At school there is the end of year stuff: the grades, the testing, the awards, the dance festival, getting my classroom sorted, new class lists, a new literacy curriculum to unpack and make room for.  There is stuff to get rid of and storage to improve.  There's stuff to do.

I decided this week, I will focus more at home (leave school ASAP so I can work at home) and next week I'll focus more at school (stay at school until I'm done) and then with faith, trust and pixie dust it will hopefully all work out!

Olivia called me last night while I was banging things around in the kitchen trying to put stuff away.  I told her what I was stressed about and she said, "That's hard."

She told me what she was stressed about and I said, "Don't worry!  Everything is going to be fine."

I hope it helped her as much as it helped me.

Weekend

 Friday night we had dinner (Greek) with the Porters and then went to Jersey Boys at The Ruth.  It was so fun!  We loved the show.  At the intermission, Nola was googling about their lives and Dave said, "Don't tell me!"

We were invested.

I have reached a new level.  I remember my grandma used to have a refrigerator of restaurant leftovers.  I took a little cooler with us Friday night because I knew I would have leftovers from dinner and Dave and Nola put their leftovers in the cooler too and we are well on our way to being senior citizens.

Next I need a drawer of folded up aluminum foil.

Saturday was busy!  In addition to our already pretty full Saturday, we moved Mark.

It could have been a lot harder and I was trying to mentally brace for that, but he was completely ready.  He had even loaded 90% of his stuff--what would fit in his car.  He and Adam carried the last heavy things and I carried his computer monitor and record player to the back seat of our car for safe keeping.  We went to lunch and standing on the street outside the restaurant, I probably made 10 phone calls to pharmacies looking for diabetic sensors.  They are in short supply.  Adam was making calls too.  They would tell him no, but they would tell me that they didn't have any according to their computer, but they would go check the shelf.

I told Adam it was because I told them it was for my son.

People will often try to help a mother.  That's science. 

I finally found some!  I said, "You're the Walmart pharmacy in Orem right?"

I had called so many, I had lost track.

I helped Mark get settled a bit, but he was mostly doing it himself.  He was determined.  He was emptying out old drawers and bins of childhood treasures.  I am not opposed to any of that.

Adam and I went back to the pharmacy later and we also went to Hobby Lobby because I wanted to get some decorations for Lili's bridal shower in Nevada next weekend.

I had bought some bunting from Amazon and I took it to color match.  I had the idea to get similarly colored cheesecloth to run the length of the tables.  

They were out of the colors I was looking for.

There was this weirdly shimmery burlap (don't ask me--it had a strip of shiny plastic woven into it) that was dyed different colors, but I wasn't looking for shimmery.

I opened the package of bunting that I brought to get a better look at the colors and a Hobby Lobby employee said in a disgruntled voice, "Can I help you?"

I said I was fine.

She said, "Well, you opened a package and I would like to know what you are doing."

I explained that it was my package I had brought.  She hovered very close to me, suspicious, so I decided to ask her advice.  

Let's just say she didn't share my vision.

I thanked her for her help and went to look at the fabric.

I ended up with some tulle.  I took it to the fabric cutter and she started to unwrap it to measure and I said, "Wait, I'm going to get a different color."

I got a darker color and had her cut twelve yards (because I didn't know how much I would need and I would rather have too much than too little).

I was buying everything (I also got a dozen small vases) when Adam came inside.  He had sat in the car answering email.  I think he was afraid the craft store had swallowed me.

"I thought you'd be a few minutes," he said.

I explained to him how I take my role as the person in charge of decorating very seriously.

We went to Trader Joe's even though we were tired of shopping and it was nearing 7:00 and we hadn't had dinner.  

When we would ask each other why we were going to Trader Joe's.  Do we really need anything?  We'd remember the green beans.  We had purchased some there the previous week and they were really good.

Winco doesn't have great produce.

Sunday afternoon we went on a reconnaissance mission to the cemeteries in the Salt Lake valley where our ancestors are buried.  We know the ones we always visit on Memorial Day, but there are more.  I'm not adding in aunts and uncles (I am related to 72 people in the West Jordan cemetery alone!), but just focusing on direct ancestors.  That limits West Jordan to 15-16 I think.

We met Emma at Murray Cemetery.  We found some graves there of people we are descended from that we never had visited before.  It took awhile and we wanted to go to West Jordan.  We all didn't want to leave without going to my grandma's grave, but it was on the other side of the cemetery and we'll see it in a few weeks, so we headed to West Jordan.

Adam and I went to Maverik to use the bathroom so I texted this to Emma and Mark and told them to try to find John and Matilda:

They very quickly sent us this:

They were good assets for the trip.  Mark downloaded maps of the cemeteries on his phone and he and Adam figured out the grid.  Emma made up stories and puns about names she saw on headstones.  When we were looking for Walter Atwood, I told them he was the father of Ida Amanda who died of dropsy aka Type 1 diabetes.  Emma started calling him the Dropsy Popsy.

We found everyone we were looking for (except one 4th great grandpa I forgot in Murray--we'll find him on Memorial Day).

Back in the car, Braeden called us on FaceTime.  He said QE was having a "fractious" day and they thought maybe talking to us would help.  I asked her if she wanted a story.  She did.  And she wanted her dad to leave and close the door.

I told her The Three Pigs and Adam told her The Three Pumpkins, which was a story he just invented.

He told her it was true because one of the pumpkins, Roger, had told it to him.

It was a good weekend.

I had a dream last night that we were all on a field trip to Disneyland.  We didn't have enough chaperones and were losing kids right and left.  Also, the kindergarten classes were there and they had subs.  I like going to Disneyland, but I was very glad that was only a dream.  There are three weeks of school left.  I think my subconscious mind understands.

Grateful Friday

 I'm grateful to be wrapping up a difficult week.

I'm grateful that when I send wonky ill-formed migraine sub plans to my team, they text back, "No problem," and "Feel better," and "We got this!"  

And I know they do.

Miriam called after school to update me and check on me.

I'm grateful I started feeling human again.  By mid afternoon, I was starting to feel like maybe eating.  I found some Fritos in the pantry and they were just what I needed.

I'm grateful Mark is moving home this weekend.  Sometimes adult children are a boomerang and I'm here for it.  I'm not sad when they move home for a bit.  As part of Mark's work less and go to school more plan, he is economizing by moving back where we pay for stuff.  (At least basic needs.)

I warned Mark what Emma said, "When you live with your parents, you have everything except peace."

I'm grateful we have plans with Dave and Nola tonight.

It's nice to have friends.

Rock bottom

 Maybe it was the toxic positivity/ gaslighting:  If it was any team that had to deal with this, I'm glad it's yours because you are so great.

Just stop.

Maybe it was the tone deafness when 3rd grade couldn't use the bathrooms in our hall:  Have your students go to the 1st/2nd hall instead of the 5th/6th hall because they're testing and we don't want to disturb them.

Meanwhile we're testing next to a jackhammer.

Maybe it was the fact that I went home with a migraine on Tuesday that made my evening miserable and hadn't completely gone away.

Whatever it was, I went to school yesterday, as Alissa put it, with guns a blazin'.

I saw her first thing and said, "I'm going to go talk to Matt.  Want to come?"

She said yes.  We got Miriam and then we went to the office.

Riley saw us coming and said, "Uh-oh."

I told Matt we needed to talk to him.  He said, "OK."

I said, "In your office."

This is the problem with having teachers Thelma-years-old.  I've lived a long life and I'm not ready to be pushed around.

We aired our grievances and he was sort of shocked by some of the things we'd been told.  He said there was nothing he could do about the contractors' hours (for example, they pretty consistently leave at 2:00 PM).  I asked, "Why do they hold all the power in this relationship?"

He said, "Have you ever hired a contractor?"

I said, "Yes, I actually have."  (Again, I'm Thelma-years-old.)

It was nice to be heard though.

They all suddenly hopped to, finding us alternate testing locations in the school.  And alternate existing locations.  They checked in with us and made sure we had everything we needed.  They brought each third grade teacher a Swig at lunch time.

Guns a blazin' helps sometimes.

It was still awful.

Everyone was dysregulated and emotional and stressed.  

The admin and coaches have been dropping in unannounced all year to observe lessons and ask our students what they are learning to encourage us to communicate learning intentions.

I said, "Don't stop by and ask our students what our learning intentions are today."

Alissa said, "We have none."

We had inside recess because of the rain.

Miriam's husband texted her that their dryer had caught fire.

We watched the rest of Wall-E in the afternoon.

I walked with Kim after school and that helped the stabbing pain behind my eye.  It was good to just breathe air and be on the hill behind our houses where, guess what?  There aren't any jackhammers.

All evening I avoided screens and noise.  I was home alone, but I didn't listen to anything.

I went to bed early and Adam came home from church and we talked a minute, then I went back to sleep.  A bit after midnight, I was awakened by an earthquake!  It was small, 3.9, and just over the mountain.  It freaked me out.  It was so short that I was sure there would be more and my just under the surface migraine came back with a vengeance.

Adam was on his laptop, trying to find out information about the earthquake and I was trying not to die.  After a while, I staggered to my chair.  I decided I was gong to take a sick day.  Enough.  I needed a day of peace to recover.  I have never felt more guilty and like I was deserting the army about taking a sick day.  I don't know if my class will be able to stay in our classroom or will have to go elsewhere.  I wrote my plans (in the 2:00 AM hour, so they're about that coherent) with a lot of work on the computers in the hopes that would make the day easier.

I'm 10% hopeful that it will be quieter tomorrow.

10% is a small number, but demolition can't go on forever right?  You eventually hit bedrock?