It's because I don't want to do anything else. I have a lovely to do list in my lovely planner.
But I don't want to do it.
I don't like Christmas vacation being over.
I don't like reading other people's blogs where they're exulting in the time they now have that vacation is over and school is back in session and their children are gone.
I don't like it because I'm jealous.
I want to be exultant because I have free time.
I'm busy. Busier than I was during vacation. Busier than I want to be.
And who is to blame?
Me. (I chose this tumultuous mothering/homeschooling life of mine. I chose it.)
It's dark and windy and cold outside (and inside my soul).
Here's what helps: Adam. Here's what he sent me today after I emailed him my angst about going to Target for ONE MAIN REASON, and promptly forgetting it.
Repeat after me:
I am not an idiot.
I am smart.
I am beautiful.
I am busy.
I am married to the funniest man in the world.
I love you.
Adam makes everything better. And he'll be home soon. And he will make me laugh. Because it's what he does. I think I'm going to go light a million candles (give or take). When a day is dark sometimes all you can do is add some light of your own.