Tuesday, January 6, 2009

I Have Nothing to Say

So you are obviously wondering then, why are you writing a post?

It's because I don't want to do anything else. I have a lovely to do list in my lovely planner.

But I don't want to do it.

I don't like Christmas vacation being over.

I don't like reading other people's blogs where they're exulting in the time they now have that vacation is over and school is back in session and their children are gone.

I don't like it because I'm jealous.

I want to be exultant because I have free time.

I'm not.

I'm busy. Busier than I was during vacation. Busier than I want to be.

And who is to blame?

Me. (I chose this tumultuous mothering/homeschooling life of mine. I chose it.)

It's dark and windy and cold outside (and inside my soul).

Here's what helps: Adam. Here's what he sent me today after I emailed him my angst about going to Target for ONE MAIN REASON, and promptly forgetting it.

Repeat after me:

I am not an idiot.

I am smart.

I am beautiful.

I am busy.

It happens.

I am married to the funniest man in the world.

I love you.

Adam makes everything better. And he'll be home soon. And he will make me laugh. Because it's what he does. I think I'm going to go light a million candles (give or take). When a day is dark sometimes all you can do is add some light of your own.

1 comment:

Susie and Jay Larson said...

Good husband! So windy and blustery today aye aye aye.(read like your pepe Gonzales-forgive my random mood) That is so cool about your cousin playing for the Falcons. Today James shook his sippy cup of milk all over the carpet then later squished all the salad dressing onto the table. Where was I? trying to make a new internet header trying to escape being a mom for a half hour. Your blog rocks and you do too.Thanks for letting me ramble on yours.


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