Thursday, January 28, 2016

Bizarre

The only one around here who hasn't been acting strangely is Adam.

Me:

The other day at physical therapy I was debating with the college student who works there about NFL quarterbacks.  I said, "I don't care what you say about Cam Newton, I don't like him because he tore down a Seahawks flag and threw it on the ground.  That's rude."

Then I thought, I don't even know who I am anymore.

I watch too much SportsCenter.  Even though I'm reading a book, it soaks into my consciousness.  And mostly I can't read anyway because I'm doing exercises.  So SportsCenter it is.

Emma:

She went to brunch with her friends last Saturday.  We asked her about her time and she was typically sparse with information.  (Much like her uncle Ammon, she would make a great prisoner of war.  You can't get her to fold under questioning.)

Walking into church the next day, I saw she had new shoes.  "Oh," she said breezily, "we went shopping after brunch."

"Really?" I said.  Emma going shopping without me twisting her arm seemed unlikely.

"Yes," she said, "And Adri liked these shoes and if Adri liked them, I had to get them."

(Apparently Adri = fashion guru)

"Adri was glad to have us to shop with," Emma continued.  "Her mom and sister don't like shopping."

You could have knocked me over (literally, I was walking on an icy parking lot at the time).  "You don't like shopping!" I said.  In the history of ever there's never been anyone who hates shopping as much as Emma.

She just shrugged.

So now I don't know who she is anymore.

And then there's Mark:

The other day he confessed to me, "I think I peaked the summer of 2014."

"Really," I said, "why do you say that?"

"I used to make a box of macaroni and cheese and eat the whole thing."

"That's you peaking?" I asked.

"No," he said, "that was the beginning of the decline."

Speaking of Mark and food, we have started a new healthy eating plan around here and on the first night, when I was making dinner I realized I had bought the wrong ingredients (because sometimes when I shop I forget how to read).  Mark put his arm around me and kissed my temple, because that's about where he reaches now.

"Don't worry," he said, "we'll call it First Night Troubleshooting."

It's a bizarre little world with these people, but I like it.


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