A Pause

I don't know what it is. Maybe it's the poor health of a beloved family member. Maybe it's the Kit American Girl books we just read for the mother daughter book club Emma and I are a part of...they're set in the Depression. Maybe it's having just heard about a baby that passed away after a long health struggle. Maybe it's the stake youth fireside we attended last night where a World War II veteran shared his experiences.

I don't know what it is.

But I have to pause for a minute. I have to express my gratitude. I'm grateful for piles of laundry and piles of dishes that indicate healthy active family members. I'm grateful for messes made by my creative robust children. (I'm grateful they're big enough to clean up the messes...with my prodding.)

I'm grateful to be busy. I'm glad I'm needed. I am thankful for a house that needs vacuuming and windows that need washing.

I'm thankful that at the fireside last night, the veteran showed us a Nazi flag so that when he showed us the American flag, the contrast in emotions I felt brought tears to my eyes.

I am appreciative of my van that needs gas because it's been driving us where we need to go.

I'm thankful my kids want to talk to me. Even when I want to hear myself think instead of hear their prattle. Even when my eyes wander away from the Star Wars sticker book and Mark patiently says, "Mom..." until I remember and look again at just what a clone looks like. They want to talk to me. Even when they sense my disinterest, they want to talk to me.

And I'm grateful.