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Monday, October 29, 2012

Let them be

Key to living authentically is letting other people do the same.

Of course there are plenty of times when you have to encroach on someone's authenticity.  Especially when you're a mother and your children think they can best express their authenticity staying in their pajamas all day, playing video games.  As the grown up you insist on brushed teeth, vaccinations, seat belts, homework and their towel hung up whether they like it or not.

Other times, you can let them be authentic.  Even when it's painful.

My older son with the crop of curls on his head, despises his curls.  Every opportunity he gets, he talks someone (usually female) into applying a straightening iron to his head.  I think it looks bad.  I prefer the curls.

It's not up to me.

This should extend to people beyond our children too.  Everyone has the same amount of time every day.  Rather than lament that someone else does things you only wish you had time for, take a look at your life and understand that your time is being taken by choices you've made.  If those choices are right for you, don't begrudge someone else the time to pursue what they want.

There have been many instances over the years when my friends do things I wish I had time for.  For example, my friends Stephanie and Dianna go to the temple a morning each week.  I would dearly love to go with them--and they've invited me--but I am responsible for the education of a young sprite on weekday mornings.  Rather than feel wistful that I can't join Stephanie and Dianna, I try to remember that I have made a different choice.  (And one that, sadly enough, won't stay around forever.  Young sprites have a way of growing up.)

Adam said a lot of these posts are about time.  Maybe I'm obsessed with time...

3 comments:

Sage Grayson said...

Very true. We make our own choices, and we make time for what's most important to us. Feeling jealous isn't helpful, so we must either be content with our choices or make new ones.

(I think I'm a bit obsessed with time too!)

Olivia Cobian said...

Well put!

Stephanie L Johnson said...

I feel a bit wistful that you can't go with us as well, but I well remember the days that I could not get away and look forward when you can go with us. Then, of course, you will miss your time, at home, with your own little pumpkins, so we must enjoy the moment we are in.

hugs

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