Mark's world view

During lunch last week...

Mark: So when Braeden gets his new phone, will you be able to see where the phone is?

Me: Yes, and I'm glad.  When he's not home when he's supposed to be, I can know if he's still at the school because play practice is going long or if he's dead in a ditch somewhere. (Because I don't want to text or call in case he's driving...the dilemma!)

Mark:  That's not how it works, Mom.

Me:  What do you mean?

Mark:  If he were dead in a ditch, he wouldn't have a phone.  When you kill someone, you take all their stuff.

Me: I didn't mean he would be murdered.  I meant a car accident.  And I didn't really think he'd be dead.

Mark:  The only way he would be dead in a ditch and still have his phone is if he were ejected from the car and his phone was in his pocket.

At this point I was regretting the entire conversation.  So Braeden, drive carefully.  I have lunch every day with Mark and he kind of freaks me out.