Perspective

When little things are so important, it's because there aren't any big ones.

I read that recently in the book Mrs. Mike by Benedict and Nancy Freedman.  (It's our book club selection for the month.)

I keep thinking about it.

Because it's a profound statement.

I am really (really) good at making little things in my life become important things.  And I shouldn't.

When I can step back a little, I realize that mostly whatever is an annoyance/stress/anxiety/hassle is really just a little thing.   I realize that the reason it feels so big is because I don't have any big problems.

And for that I'm grateful.

Emma's gone to Oregon with her grandma and I took my boys on errands with me.  (What possessed me to do this is beyond me.)

As the errands wore on, I told myself over and over again, When little things are so important, it's because there aren't any big ones.   

When Mark groused about having "to be dragged along on errands when all I want to do is stay home", I thought,  little thing.  


When Mark crawled into the cart at Costco (yes I had to go again) and complained about how much room all the stuff was taking up and he was uncomfortable, I thought, little thing.


When Mark had to use the bathroom and I had to wait endlessly for him, I thought, little thing.


When he forgot his jacket in the bathroom and I had to send him back and wait some more, I thought, little thing.


When both boys thought they'd die of starvation and let me know the supposed end was near, I thought, little thing.


When they asked me every 30 seconds, how many more errands ARE there?  How much longer will this take, I thought, little thing.


When they disappeared in Fred Meyer and I had to hunt them down, I thought, little thing.

When they argued over which movie they thought I should buy them (I chose neither), I thought, little thing?


When Mark leaned on the self checkout sensor and caused it to go haywire and when they started wrestling spontaneously while I tried to appease the self checkout sensor, I thought, little thing?!?

When Mark had to use the bathroom again and I was waiting without a teeny tiny bit of patience left, I forgot the whole "little thing" idea.  I was annoyed.  I wondered why I brought the boys with me anyway?  I wondered why children are such a pain? Why?

The last stop was Albertson's and because Braeden could smell danger in the air, he offered to walk Mark down to Blockbuster while I shopped.  Of course that resulted in the eventual renting of movies but it was worth it.

Then I came home, feeling dejected.  I had been looking forward to Pleasant Spring Break times with my children.  And I'm not very pleasant.

I felt guilty that I'd let my new mantra out of my grasp. 

You can always reinstate mantras though.  Errands with children is a soul sapping, miserable pursuit.  That's all it will ever be.  But only when I have nothing bigger to cause me trouble.

I will gratefully take my little troubles.