Moms are just cops who love you.
The vast majority of the time, I just get to enjoy these kids. We roll along pleasantly, doing our thing. Occasionally, I have to be the parent.
One day last week I told Adam, "Usually I'm not jealous that you get to go to work, but today I was."
He said, "Usually I'm not grateful that I get to go to work, but today I was."
It had been that sort of day.
It was a day of no you can't do that and yes you will do that and stop pouting and I'm sorry I lost my temper and no I'm not going to tell you what to do because you have to decide and a whole lot of thinking I don't get paid enough.
Sometimes a hard conversation has to happen and you look around and realize that you're the mother and you are the one who needs to have the hard conversation. This is my circus and these are my monkeys.
It's not for the faint of heart.
Like a lot of hard things though, it's worth it. Even when you punctuate a text message and your teenage daughter thinks you must be mad because you ended your sentence with a period, even when you're looking up (will I ever get used to that?) into the eyes of a teenage son who is looking back at you with incredulous angst because you are so unreasonable. It's worth it. Because eventually, you talk it out. You know all along that you love each other and always will. You apologize and hug and realize that even on the most frustrating days, it's a blessing to have these strong-willed irksome people belong to you.
Motherhood is tough. If you just want a wonderful little creature to love you can get a puppy.