Three Loves

Adam told me about a conversation he had with Braeden.  Braeden and Emma are both constantly "working on a story" and Braeden said that one of the characters in the story he was writing was going to be in love with someone.  But Braeden said, "I don't know anything about being in love though.  So can you tell me?"

I think Adam may have laughed at him.  Where to start?

Adam said they ended up having an interesting conversation and talked about three kinds of love that Ancient Greeks described.

agápe

Agápe is love like is described in 1 Corinithians 13 in the New Testament:

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.  Charity never faileth...

When I think about agápe, I think of the many myriad ways I've been served in my life.  I think of my parents.  I think of friends who cared for me after my babies were born.  I think of my friends now, giving my kids rides, bringing me dinner when my oven self destructs, being on my side in the parenting adventures I encounter.


philía

Philía is friendship and affection.  (Philadelphia=city of brotherly love.) When I think of philía I think of Adam bantering on a basketball court with his friends.  I think of Braeden whispering to me before church started that his friend Max (who was speaking that day) couldn't get the document to open for the talk he'd prepared on his laptop.  But he had to speak anyway.  Braeden told me, "I'm praying for him."  That's philía.  I think of Emma chattering with her friends in high pitched and earnest ways, punctuated frequently with "I know, right?"  I think of Mark and his best buddy Gavin, hurtling through life, happiest by each others' side.  I think of Gavin, older, wiser, telling Mark advice under his breath...how to stay out of trouble.  (And to Mark I say, listen to Gavin.)  I think of my sisters convincing me it's all going to be all right and of my friends and the way our eyes fill with tears sometimes when we talk. (I may or may not cry easily.)

éros


This of course is romantic love.  When Adam and I were preparing for our big seven course meal, we went to three different stores to find the crackers we were seeking for the cheese course.  We knew exactly what we wanted.  The crackers were pretty important, don't get me wrong, but maybe we were also just prolonging our errand time.  It is fun being together.  Adam is all three types of love rolled into one.

Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.

Emily Brontë

Love...what's not to love? Happy Valentine's Day!