Saturday, December 13, 2008

Lucy, You Got Some Splainin to Do

I don't mind talking about myself...I really don't (hence the blog). I just wish that I didn't have to explain so much.

I find myself in social settings (which I've never been all that good at). Some kind person is trying to make conversation and they ask me questions. Questions for which there are no succinct answers. I need better answers; I need to invent a life that can be easily summed up.

Because here's the thing, I don't think kind people in social settings really care that much. They're just asking to fill some void.

(What I really should do is stay home and mind my own business.)

So, did you grow up around here?

No, I grew up in Nevada.

Nevada? Where in Nevada?

Have you heard of Elko?

(If they're from Utah or California) I think so...

I grew up between Elko and another small town, Wells.

On a farm?

No (I don't know, in their minds does the middle of the sagebrush qualify as a "farm"? When I think of a farm, I think of Charlotte's Web and Mr. Zuckerman...in that case it wasn't so much of a farm.)...my dad had cattle but sold them when I was young. He makes bits and spurs now.

(Having a look on their face like they have NO idea what I'm talking about.)

(Waggling my fingers) He made my rings.

Oh. (Still not seeming sure what to make of it all.)

So how did you meet Adam?

(Yes! A simple answer!) At BYU.

What did you study?

Elementary Education (phew, another quick one)

Oh, that's right...I heard you...homeschool.

(Here we go.) Yes.

Why did you start that?/How do you do that?/What's wrong with you anyway?

(I explain...I try to be brief.)

So where does Adam work?

Amazon.com (dreading the follow up question)

What does he do?

Uh....



Really, I am capable of short communication.

Why don't they ask me how many children I have?



How many children do you have?

Three.

Three?

Three.

Oh.

3 comments:

Melanee and Ammon said...

I understand you completely. I somehow can't explain anything in short ways and I'm not as graceful at this sort of conversation as I'd like to be. This is why I avoid phone calls and big parties. It doesn't help that I have no clue where I come from. I was born in Idaho, moved 27 times, and I'm only 25. What can I say, it just isn't simple. I think some people have a gift for "splainin" and awkward conversation and some do not. I do not.

Suzanne said...

Loved this post. When I married into my husban's family (he grew up in the same house his entire childhood)his mom had me sit down with her at the table. She had a pen in hand and a blank sheet of paper.

There, she had to write down notes on how my dad married my mom, they each had two boys of thier own, then had the three of us, then divorced. Then my dad married my step-mom, who is 20 years younger than him.

So, I'm with you, I've got way way way too much splanin to do. That's why I blog. So if that girl were to be polite and curteous, she'd ask for your blog address, then ask questions. Rude chick. That's what I say.

Hannah Stevenson said...

I loved the "What does Adam do?" question...my response is the same as yours..."uh".

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