Knowing

A while ago, Adam asked me, "What are the gift giving expectations for our anniversary?"

Emma laughed.  And laughed and laughed.  To the point of it was disrespectful to her mother.

Everyone knows gifts are my love language.  I love getting gifts.  It makes me feel loved.  It doesn't need to be anything fancy or expensive, but when someone picks out a gift just for me, I feel loved.

It does kind of make me feel like a jerk when I'm married to someone who could care less about gifts.

Adam did get me a lovely gift though.  I felt loved.  He knows me.

***

I went to my classroom yesterday and now that I know my class list and how many are in person and how many will be online, my mind is reeling with the unknown and unknowable and the little things I still need to get done.

When I got home I went into Adam's office and sat across from him and said, "I feel really stressed."

He gave me a knowing nod as if to say, "Yep, right on time."  He knows me.

***

On the way to our dinner date, I told Adam about something I heard on the radio.  I talked about Ter-Ter and he knew immediately I was talking about the radio program Fresh Air.  Years ago, we were listening to an interview on Fresh Air and the person being interviewed called Terri Gross Ter-Ter, which struck us as funny.

I told Adam what I'd heard on the radio and he looked at me appreciatively and said, "That's interesting."

He's a big idea kind of guy and he loves having his thinking challenged and deepened.  I told him what I was thinking about and he nodded and listened and I could tell understood.  He knows me.

***

I don't know if it is the wild temperature extremes or fault lines but Utah never seems to be able to have smooth pavement.  It is always buckled or cracked.  The restaurant parking lot was no exception.  I was wearing heels for the first time since March and Adam steered me onto the safest ground in the parking lot.  He knows me.

***

While we were eating, when we weren't people watching and making up stories/trying to determine the relationships for other diners, Adam told me all the ways he's grateful to be married to me.  It made me teary eyed.  He stopped talking and tilted his head and smiled at me and my tears.  He knows me.

***

I keep thinking about how young and naive and inexperienced I was when we got married.  I for sure didn't know all the ramifications of who I was marrying and all the unknown scenarios we would find ourselves in.

I'm glad I married Adam though.  When you know, you know.